James Potter and the Marauders
by luvthemarauders
Summary: My version of the Marauders' first year at Hogwarts. My first fic, so please let me know how it is!
1. Hogwarts Express

James Potter and the Marauders

Disclaimer:  If I owned Harry Potter, I'd be sitting in a mansion on the beach somewhere, not writing fanfiction, but I don't so don't sue!

A/N: This is my first fanfic, so pleeze r&r and tell me what you think!  

            Eleven year old James Potter surveyed Platform 9 ¾ eagerly as he said good-bye to his parents.  He was going into his first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and this was the first time he had ever seen the Hogwarts Express.  As he made his way toward the waiting train, James looked around at his future classmates.  One pair in particular captured his attention; a beautiful fifth year girl with glossy black hair, a dusky Spanish-looking complexion, and aristocratic features was speaking to a boy James's age that could have been her brother.  What drew his attention, however, was not their good looks, but the disgust and hatred in their voices and expressions.  The boy was tall for his age, but the girl was older and towered over him.  They were speaking in low voices, but James was near enough that he could hear everything they said.

            James recognized the pair immediately.  Although he'd never seen them before, their glossy black hair marked them as members of one of the most powerful and influential families in the wizarding world: the Blacks.

            "And just what do you think you're doing here?" the girl hissed angrily.

            "I'm sorry, I wasn't informed that the Hogwarts Express was reserved for Death Eaters and evil bitches." the boy growled as his handsome face darkened in a venomous glare.

            That struck James as slightly odd considering that it was common knowledge that the Blacks were into the Dark Arts.  It sounded like this boy hated the Dark Arts as much as most normal wizards.  James vaguely recalled his father saying that Sirius Black, the heir to the Black family, would be attending Hogwarts this year, but if that were him, why would he be fighting with his family?  

            "I'm amazed your mother isn't too ashamed to let you out of the house." the dark haired girl hissed.

            "Yeah, I'm sure it would ruin her reputation if the wizard community found out that she has a son who doesn't believe that anyone with Muggle blood should be killed off to keep the old bloodlines pure." the boy, most likely Sirius Black, snarled.

With that he spun on his heal and stalked off toward the train as the whistle sounded warning the remaining students on the platform that it would soon be leaving.  James watched him for a second; this was definitely odd.

James shrugged it off and boarded the train and began looking for an open seat, about halfway back he found a car that was empty except for a tall, tawny haired boy in patched jeans that were a little bit too small who was staring distractedly out the window.

"Mind if I sit here?" he asked

The boy looked startled, but he shook his head.  "Go ahead, there's plenty of room."

James smiled, "I'm James Potter."

"Remus Lupin.  Need some help with your stuff?" he glanced at James' large suitcase and the cage that held Hooters, the horned owl that his parents had gotten him as a gift for his first year at Hogwarts (his parents had no idea that the name had come from a certain less-than-moral Muggle bar).  

"Nah, I think I got it." James said, stuffing the luggage haphazardly into the overhead compartment.  He smiled and ran one hand through his unruly black hair.

"So, um, you a first year, too?" he asked

"Yeah, I never thought I'd actually be coming to Hogwarts." Remus replied.

"Why's that?"

"I dunno, just nerves I guess, didn't think I'd get into the best wizarding school in the world."

The explanation sounded rushed, and he didn't look James in the eye, but James didn't push it.  Instead he dug around in the pockets of his jeans and pulled out a Dungbomb he had bought in Diagon Alley.  Remus's amber eyes lit up mischievously, all his shyness forgotten.

"Where'd you get that?"

"Diagon Alley, I had to sneak away from my mum to buy it; she'd pitch a fit if she knew I was bringing this stuff to school."

Remus laughed.  "Here, watch this; it's a cool little spell I learned from a neighbor." 

James watched curiously as his new friend muttered a spell over the Dungbomb.

"Ok, ready." Remus grinned.

They opened the compartment and were about to go look for a good place to drop it, when an idea struck James.  The compartment across from them was filled with noisy sixth year girls who were already wearing Ravenclaw robes.  He motioned to Remus to sit back down and slid the compartment door closed until it was only a slit.

He pointed his own wand at the Dungbomb and said _"Wingardium Leviosa."_  It began to levitate out of his open hand until it was floating in mid-air in front of him.  James pointed his wand toward the door and the Dungbomb flew out the crack and into the other compartment.  The two boys stifled their laughter against the backs of their hands as the Dungbomb exploded in a huge burst of light and sparks (Remus's addition) and the girls screamed.  James pulled the door closed all the way so the girls wouldn't notice them watching and turned to Remus.

"You're alright." he grinned, "What do you say, friends?" 

He offered his hand to the tawny haired boy who looked startled.  He slowly reached for James's hand, his face breaking into a smile that almost hid the tired bags under his eyes.  "Friends."

About a half hour into the journey, the compartment door slid open to reveal Sirius Black, the boy from the platform. Seeing his face straight on, James was surprised to see that Sirius had bright blue eyes that contrasted sharply with his black hair and Spanish complexion, creating a look that all the girls were bound to notice.  He was wearing a mischievous grin that made him look distinctly less-Slytherin than he had on the platform.

"Mind if I sit with you guys?" he asked as he plopped himself down next to James without waiting for an answer.  "If anyone asks, I've been sitting here the whole time, okay?"

Three thoughts struck James at once; first was that Sirius Black was every bit as arrogant as would be expected from a member of his family as it never even crossed his mind that they might object to his sitting with them.  The question had been, more than anything, just a way to get their attention.  A glance at Remus confirmed that he recognized also and agreed with James's assessment of him.  

Second was the fact that it was pretty unusual for a Black to sit with people like James and Remus instead of more 'prominent' wizarding families.  Although both boys were pure-blooded, the Potters would be considered blood traitors by people like the Blacks because they didn't care if their children married Muggle-born wizards and the Lupins didn't have nearly enough money to be considered good companionship for a member of the Black family.

The thing that had the most effect on James, however, was the crooked grin on Sirius's handsome face.  It was a grin that James saw all the time in the mirror when he'd just pulled some kind of prank on an unsuspecting victim.  Surely anyone who had enough of a sense of humor to prank wasn't into the Dark Arts, and by judging Sirius by his blood, wasn't he lowering himself to the same level as those wizards who thought that pure blood made them better than everyone else?

 "What did you do?" he asked.

"Oh, nothing.  Nothing at all." Sirius replied, his grin growing wider and more crooked until it looked less like a grin than a smirk.

James knew what his father would say if he heard that his son was friends with the heir of the Black family, but James felt that anyone who pulled pranks couldn't be half as bad as people said the Blacks were.  He extended his hand to the blue eyed boy.

 "I'm James Potter, this is Remus Lupin."

Sirius grasped his hand without hesitation and shook it firmly.

"Sirius Black."

Then he turned to Remus who seemed to have reverted to his original shyness, and shook his hand.

"Nice to meet you guys."

Remus's reply was cut off by the sound of a small explosion a few cars back and a shrill voice began singing loudly and off-key.  The voice was so piercing that they all covered their ears and Sirius's grin began to look slightly wicked.  The voice continued and Remus and James realized it was singing a love song to somebody named Herbert Wimplefeild. 

"You did that?" James asked appreciatively, deciding once and for all that this kid was okay no matter what his name was.

"A little present for my dear, beloved cousin." James realized that that must have been the girl he saw talking to Sirius on the platform.  Of course, he should have known that Sirius Black didn't have any older sisters.

"Who's Herbert Wimplefeild?" Remus asked.

"This fat, ugly Slytherin fourth year that's had a crush on Bellatrix since his first day of school.  I think it pisses her off that someone like him would _dare_ to have a thing for her." Sirius said darkly.

"You don't sound too fond of her." Remus observed.

"Yeah, well she's a bitch." came the reply.  That seemed like enough proof for both James and Remus that Sirius wasn't like his family.

A few moments later the singing shut off and they heard a girl's voice screech, "I'LL GET YOU, SIRIUS BLACK!"

All three started laughing hysterically and couldn't stop until the door slid open again and a plump witch asked if they wanted anything off the snack cart.  The three boys immediately started digging in their pockets for money and bought some of everything on the cart.  They piled the candy onto the seat and began to wolf it down at an amazing rate.

            While they were finishing up their sweets, the compartment door slid open again to reveal a slender blonde boy flanked by what looked to be two walking slabs of muscle with small, evil eyes.  They recognized the blonde as Lucius Malfloy, the heir of probably the only family in Britain that could rival the Blacks in wealth and influence, and who were also known to be involved in the Dark Arts.

            "Well, well, if it isn't Sirius Black." Malfloy drawled, "You haven't even reached the school yet and you're already hanging with riffraff.  What would your mother say?" he tutted. 

            Sirius stood up, his face darkening with rage, and his wand suddenly appeared in his hand.  James and Remus stood up, also. "Get out of here, Malfloy.  Now." Sirius bit out through clenched teeth.

            "Ooo, did I hit a nerve?" Malfloy mocked.

            "If you know what's good for you, Malfloy, you'll leave right now." Sirius growled.

            "Oh, I don't think we will." he drawled lazily as his two body guards cracked their knuckles and caused their huge biceps to bulge.

            "You think I'm afraid of Crabbe and Goyle?" Sirius sneered.  "You two may think you're intimidating, but size doesn't help against the curses I could use on you, as Lucius found out the last time he was over at my house." Sirius sneered.

            Malfloy paled slightly, but quickly regained his composure.  "You'd better be careful, Black; you wouldn't want it to get back to your family that we were fighting again.  I heard they didn't take it too well the last time." 

            "Are you going to run to your mummy and have her rat me out?" Sirius scoffed

            "I know someone else who would be more than happy to let it slip who you're associating with." Malfloy responded darkly.

            "Ooo, running to Bella now?  I never pictured you as one to let a girl handle all your fights, even if she is a better witch than you'll ever be." Sirius sneered.

            Malfloy took his wand out and Sirius was about to curse him when the compartment door slid open and a Ravenclaw prefect entered.  "Not fighting, I hope?" she asked tartly.

            Malfloy glared darkly at Sirius, but he motioned to Crabbe and Goyle to follow him as he turned on his heel and stalked out of the cabin.  Crabbe and Goyle stared after him a moment, then back to Sirius with twin looks of disappointment at not being allowed to beat the crap out of him.

            "Better follow your leader," Sirius sneered "you don't have enough intelligence between the two of you to survive without Lucius telling you exactly what to do."

            They both glared menacingly at him, but did exactly as he told them.  The prefect left with a last glare at Sirius who turned back to his two new friends and rolled his eyes.

            "Sorry about that.  Lucius Malfloy's a stupid git.  He believes all that crap about his blood making better than everyone else.  He's a Slytherin in his third year, but you wouldn't know it seeing him cast spells; I can out hex him."

            "Come on, we're almost there, we should probably get changed."  James said to take the other boy's mind off his encounter with the Slytherin. 

Sirius's dark mood vanished and the three boys left their cabin to see what kind of trouble they could get into.  By the time they had walked a little ways, the mischievous glint had returned to Sirius's eyes and there was a spring in his step. When they reached the back of the train, Sirius popped his head into a cabin filled with giggling first year girls already in their school robes.  

            "Hey ladies.  I'd like to introduce you to some people.  This is James Potter and Remus Lupin."  

Both boys looked extremely uncomfortable as the girls looked up and smiled at them.  One girl waved, while a couple more whispered among themselves.  Sirius flung himself down onto a seat next to a pretty brunette.  "So, Krissy, how's it going?"

"About the same as the last time I saw you.  Which was what, like twenty minutes ago?" she teased.

Sirius laughed, "Well, you never know with girls.  One moment they're happy and giggling, the next they're pissed off." he shrugged.

"Because of dumbass comments like that from prats like you." she answered, swatting him on the arm.  "So are your friends going to sit down, or just stand in the doorway?" she asked.

James and Remus turned bright red.  "Actually we gotta go get changed." Remus muttered.  Sirius rolled his eyes as he stood up and walked over to a suitcase in the corner with a beautiful jet black owl sleeping in a cage on top of it.

"Don't wake up or anything, Nightshade." he told the owl sarcastically.  "You might be mistaken for a living animal."  The owl just hooted dismissively at him with out taking its head out from under its wing.

"Leave her alone, owls are nocturnal." one of the girls scolded him.

"They don't naturally deliver mail either." Sirius responded as he moved the cage off his suitcase.  The owl actually looked up as her cage moved and hooted grumpily.  "Sorry, girl." Sirius said; his voice much softer than it had been a moment before.  He stuck a finger through the bars of the cage and the owl nibbled it affectionately.

"Aww, how cute!" another girl cooed.

Sirius grinned.  "Yeah, well don't let it get out.  I have a reputation to protect."  He started digging through his suitcase, pulling things out as they got in his way.  He threw a pair of boxers out on the floor, and some of the girls blushed.  Finally he found his robes and stuffed everything else back in so haphazardly that he had to use magic to get it all to fit.

"Well, see you girls later.  I gotta split before these two stay that color permanently." he jerked his thumb toward James and Remus who blushed even more furiously.  Sirius laughed as they pulled him back toward their own compartment.


	2. Sorting Ceremony

Eventually they felt the steam engine slowing down as they arrived at Hogwarts.  They piled out of the train, leaving their luggage at assurances from the older children that it would be delivered to their dorm rooms safe and sound.  In the midst of the confusion, the three boys saw an enormous man who was at least twice as tall as a normal human, and about five times as wide.  His black beard nearly covered his entire face, and he was wearing an overcoat that could have been made into a rug to cover an entire room.

            "Firs' years, o'er 'ere!  Firs' years!" the man bellowed.

            "Is that a giant?" James asked excitedly.

            "Nah, I heard somewhere that giants can be up to twenty feet tall.  He's not quite that big." Remus answered quietly as they made their way toward the massive man.

            They were led down into an underground cavern filled with water. "Divide yerselves into groups of four an' get in ter the boats!" he hollered.  The first years all obeyed him meekly, frightened of his size.  A small blonde boy hopped into the boat with James, Remus and Sirius and the boat immediately began moving toward the opposite shore of its own accord.  Even Sirius was so nervous that he kept his mouth shut as they were led away from the boats and up to a doorway.  A young but severe looking witch met them at the top and led them up to the Great Hall.  Many of the first years looked like they were going to be sick as they stared out at the sea of faces all turned toward them.  Remus was anxious, but more than anything he was extremely grateful to be there.  Sirius looked slightly nervous, but James seemed to be enjoying the attention.

            The young witch walked forward briskly and put an extremely old, filthy hat on a stool in the front of the room.  To the surprise of many of the first years, a tear near the brim of the hat opened like a mouth and it burst into song about the four houses; Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw and their founders.  The room broke into applause as the hat finished its song and the witch pulled a scroll out of her robes and began to read from it.

            "Adams, Richard." 

            A small, nervous looking boy stepped forward.  He was so tiny that the hat fell over his eyes.  After hardly two seconds the hat yelled "HUFFLEPUFF!" and the boy went to join the table of cheering Hufflepuffs.

            A few names later Sirius's lip twisted into a silent snarl as the professor called "Black, Narcissa" a girl that looked like a younger version of Bellatrix walked forward with her nose in the air. She had the same gorgeous black hair that was signature of the Black family, but she wasn't as nearly as beautiful as Bellatrix.  Her face looked somewhat pinched, as though she was wrinkling her nose at some foul smell only she noticed.  The hat hadn't even touched her head when it screamed SLYTHERIN!

"Probably doesn't want to dirty itself by touching her." Sirius hissed.

"Black, Sirius."  Sirius strode forward, his face set as though he were going into a battle.  They could see his determination not to be put in Slytherin as he put the hat on his head and stared defiantly out at the Slytherin table on the far side of the room.

            "Hmmm… now this is a difficult one." A soft voice spoke in his ear. "Plenty of courage here, a VERY bright mind, lots of potential.  Yes, indeed, you will be a very powerful wizard one day.  Very loyal, a strong sense of humor, and a pureblood to boot.  You'd do well anywhere."

            _Not Slytherin. _Sirius thought adamantly

            "Are you sure?" the voice asked in a slightly taunting tone, "You could do very well in Slytherin, they would help you fulfill your potential.  Not all Slytherins go bad, you know."

            _You put me in Slytherin and I'll walk out.  I'll get back on the train and leave.  _

_            "A bit stubborn, too.  Oh, very well.  I suppose it must be… GRYFFINDOR!" _

            Sirius took the hat off looking triumphant and a Ravenclaw girl who looked a lot like Bellatrix and Narcissa stood up and cheered loudly.

"Way to go Sirius!"  

There were sounds of surprise that a Black would be put in Gryffindor, and the Slytherin table started jeering.  Suddenly wild cheers broke out from a few second and third year girls, who were giggling and winking at Sirius.  The rest of the table joined in and Sirius's handsome face broke into a wide smile.  More names were called, and a nervous looking redheaded girl named Lily Evans joined the Gryffindors.  The hat considered awhile before sending Fred Longbottom to Gryffindor, followed by Remus Lupin who looked nervously at the crowd staring at him before Sirius winked at him and his nervousness began to fade.  He grabbed the hat firmly and put it on his head.

            "A werewolf, eh?" a small voice whispered in his ear.  Remus panicked for a moment before the hat chuckled.  "Don't worry, no one else can hear.  You picked a good time to come, not many headmasters are as open-minded as Dumbledore.  Where should I put you?  I see courage and a bright mind, loyalty although you have little opportunity to show it.  You're quite the loner."

            _Yea, well its kinda hard to make friends when people think you're a dangerous monster. _ Remus thought bitterly.

            "Slytherin would make it easy to keep your secret, but they wouldn't hesitate to tear you apart if they ever found out."

            _I doubt anyone would.  _Remus thought darkly, but after meeting Malfloy on the train and hearing Sirius talk about the Slytherins, he wasn't very eager to join that house anyway.

            "Not enough loyalty in Ravenclaw to stand by you if your secret got out. Even Hufflepuff would probably be afraid of you.  We'll put you in GRYFFENDOR!"

            Remus wasn't sure whether or not he was glad that he had been put with Sirius, and probably James, because although it was wonderful to have friends again, he was afraid that they would figure out his secret.  As he made his way to the cheering Gryffindors, however, Remus couldn't maintain his gloomy mood as he caught sight of Sirius's warm smile.  He sat next to his new friend, who congratulated him and whispered that they had gotten the best house of them all.

            The crowd of first years waiting to be sorted dwindled as more and more joined the houses that would be their homes for the next seven years of their lives.  Krissy Miller became a Gryffindor, and was followed by a blond girl with sparkling green eyes.  A tall blonde boy was sorted into Ravenclaw, followed by a nasty looking pair who joined the Slytherins.  A short, chubby boy with mousy brown hair looked extremely nervous as his name was called, and very surprised when the hat yelled GRYFFINDOR! 

            "Potter, James." the severe-looking witch yelled and James threw a wink at Sirius and Remus before putting on the hat.  

            "Well, well, let's see where you belong.  Hmm… we seem to have quite a few sharp minds this year.  Definitely smart enough for Ravenclaw.  A bit cocky, too, lots of courage…  You want to be with your friends.  I see a mischievous streak in you.  Better send you to someone who can handle you.  GRYFFINDOR!"

            James's smile seemed to brighten up his whole face as he went to join his two new friends at the Gryffindor table.  The sorting continued; two more girls became Gryffindors, a pale, greasy-looking boy with a hooked nose was sent to Slytherin, and eventually all the first years were sorted.  As the stern- looking professor rolled up her scroll and put away the Sorting Hat, the new headmaster stood up.

            "Hello and welcome to Hogwarts.  Or rather, welcome back for most of you.  I am Albus Dumbledore and as most of you know I am the new Headmaster here at Hogwarts.  Now I'm sure you'd all rather eat than listen to an old man listing off rules, so without further ado, the feast." Some of the first year gasped as the plates filled magically with food.  "Oh, and one more thing," Dumbledore said.  The Hall fell quiet immediately.  "I advise all of you to try the lemon drops.  They're really rather good." With that he sat down, his blue eyes twinkling merrily.  The students and staff applauded, but none louder than Remus.

            "He's the greatest wizard in the entire world." Remus said.  There were nods of agreement from around the table.

            People began to introduce themselves as they piled food on their plates.  The other two first year Gryffindor boys were Frank Longbottom; a friendly, easy going fellow, and Peter Pettigrew, a small chubby boy with mousy brown hair who was looked nearly as nervous now as before he got sorted. "I really have no idea how I got put into Gryffindor." he squeaked. "I'm not brave.  I thought for sure I'd be in Hufflepuff.  I'm Muggle born, and I'm sure I won't be any good at magic."

            Krissy Miller, the brunette from the train had become a Gryffindor, also.  "I can't wait to have classes with you, Sirius." she laughed.  "It'll be a hoot."

            Sirius just grinned at her, his mouth too stuffed with pudding to answer.  Next to Krissy, the redhead girl that had looked so nervous earlier was talking to one of the older students about their lessons.  

            "So which subject is the hardest?" she asked.

            "Transfiguration" Sirius said once he had swallowed enough food that the people around him could understand what he was saying.

            Some of the older students murmured their agreement.

            "I don't know.  I'm kind of looking forward to it." James shrugged.

            "That, my friend, is because you are completely off your rocker." Sirius informed him affectionately as he ruffled James's already messy hair.

            As they finished eating the headmaster stood up again "Now that your stomachs are full and your minds slowed down a bit, I must bore you with an old man's chatter.  For you first years, I must inform you that the Forbidden Forest is off-limits to students, as is Hogsmeade for first and second years, or anyone without a signed permission slip from their parents.  Also, I would advise anyone who wants to leave school this year with all their limbs intact to avoid the Whomping Willow that has been planted on the grounds.  Welcome to Hogwarts and I wish you all a wonderful year."

At the mention of Hogsmeade, James and Sirius's eyes lit up in a way that made some of the people sitting around them wonder if they were quite sane.

"And now," Dumbledore continued, "we will sing the school song.  Everyone pick their favorite tune."

He flicked his wand and ribbons of color came out of the end, forming into words.  The entire school began singing to different tunes.  James and Sirius bellowed it as loudly as they could, and they were audible even over the din of other voices in the hall.

            Before they left for their dorms, each of them received a piece of paper with their schedules on it.  Sirius groaned when he saw that he had Transfiguration first, and crumpled the paper in his pocket without bothering to read the rest of it.

            The students filed out of the Great Hall toward their respective dormitories.  The Gryffindors followed their prefects to a passage that dead-ended with a portrait of a fat woman in a silk dress who asked for a password.  The Gryffindor prefect said 'Skyttledower' and to their surprise the portrait swung forward to reveal a circular hole in the wall through which they could see a comfy looking common room with a fireplace.  

            "Boys' dormitory up these stairs, girls' over there." the prefect called, and they all piled up the stairs into their respective rooms.  The first year boys found themselves in a room with five four-poster beds hung with scarlet curtains.  Sirius and James immediately claimed beds next to each other that were directly opposite the doorway.  Remus yawned and threw himself onto the bed on the other side of Sirius.  Peter Pettigrew took the one next to James and Fred grabbed the bed next to Remus.  Despite Sirius and James's conspiratorial whispering, the other boys were asleep within minutes.


	3. Morning After

            The next morning, Remus awoke to the sound of someone pounding on a door and James's rather annoyed voice yelling.

 "SIRIUS BLACK!  GIVE ME BACK MY ROBES!!!"

            Remus groaned as Sirius laughed from inside the bathroom and turned on the shower.  "James, isn't it a little early to be yelling?" he asked in irritation as he rolled out of bed and looked around.  The small boy, Peter, was fumbling with his curtains and Frank was still snoring.  Remus couldn't believe anyone could sleep through James's yelling.

            "Stupid git stole my robes and he's put an Imperturbable Charm on the door!" James fumed.

            Remus rolled his eyes, but he decided that since he was up anyway, he might as well get dressed.  He ran a hand through his honey-brown hair, causing it to fall into his eyes, and pulled his suitcase out from under his bed, rummaging around for his clothes and toothbrush.  After waiting for about fifteen minutes for Sirius to finish, he finally went and rapped on the door.  "You fall in or something?  Other people need to use the bathroom, too."

            "You prat, give me back my robes!" James called loudly.

            The door opened and Sirius walked out wrapped in a towel, his hair wet, and grinning broadly.  "Calm down, mate, I just improved them a little bit."

            James ran into the bathroom and found his robes folded neatly on the counter.  They were in perfect condition, except that they were now an obnoxious shade of pink.  

"SIRIUS BLACK, I'M GONNA GET YOU!!!" James yelled as he spun around, but Sirius had already fled down the stairs to the Gryffindor common room.  Several students were already sitting in front of the fire, and they all looked shocked to see Sirius come running full-bore out of his dorm wearing nothing but a towel around his waist, laughing hysterically as James chased after him yelling things that made some of the younger girls gasp.

Remus chuckled as he watched them.  

"Raving mad, the both of them." he muttered.

"They say the first sign of insanity is talking to yourself." an amused voice spoke behind him.

Remus turned around to find Peter Pettigrew grinning at him.  

"I'm not nearly as crazy as they are." he laughed before taking advantage of James's distraction to claim the bathroom for himself. 

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            A half hour later, the three boys and Peter Pettigrew made their way down to the Great Hall for breakfast (Frank still hadn't woken up).  Sirius and James were talking excitedly, trying to figure out what kind of trouble they could cause on their first day of school, the morning's prank already forgiven.  James had even left his robes pink after Sirius had bet him 20 Sickles that he wouldn't have the guts to be wear them around school.  Remus shook his head and decided they really were insane.

            After getting lost a few times, they finally found the Great Hall (James swore it was in a different place than it had been the night before).  All eyes turned to them as they walked in and the Hall broke into laughter at the sight of James's robes.  James posed a little, thoroughly enjoying the attention as they made their way to the Gryffindor table.  A few people commented that James definitely had the famous Gryffindor bravery. Krissy Miller was talking to a redheaded girl who Sirius believed was called Evans, and laughed when she say James, but Evans just rolled her eyes. 

            "So James, how long do you think it will take for us to get detention?" Sirius asked, his eyes glittering mischievously as he reached for a plate of pastries.

            "Dunno, a few classes.  Better question; what do you think they'll do about it?" James answered as he filled his plate as many sweet things as he could fit on it.

            "Probably hang us upside down by our toenails over a pit of lava." Sirius grinned as he stuffed a chocolate covered pastry in his mouth.

            "Nah, hog-tie us and throw us in a chamber full of venomous insects." James smiled brightly.

            "You're both completely off your rockers."  Remus informed them as he heaped his plate full of bacon, eggs, and toast.  Peter looked back and forth between them with fear on his face, obviously thinking they were serious.

            James and Sirius were still trying to figure out what kind of horrible punishments they were likely to get when all four boys finished their breakfasts and arrived at their first class.

            The severe-looking witch who had run the Sorting the night before looked them over as they found their seats.  Her eyes narrowed at the sight of James's pink robes, but she didn't comment on them.  A couple of girls pointed and giggled, but they fell silent at a quick look from the professor.  As the last few students sat down, she greeted them stiffly.  "My name is Professor McGonagall.  I am the Transfiguration teacher and the head of Gryffindor house.  I think you will find that Transfiguration will be the most difficult class many of you will take during your time at Hogwarts.  It will take diligent studying and a lot of practice if you want to master the ability, but once you do, I believe you will find it to be one of the most useful branches of magic for whatever career you choose to pursue." With that she gave a demonstration of turning her desk into a pig.  "Quills out please, we will be attempting to turn matches into needles, but first you must take notes.  Don't worry if you don't get it today, as I said before, Transfiguration is very difficult."

            "She sounds like a lot of fun." Sirius whispered as they pulled their supplies out.  The other boys sniggered and Professor McGonagall looked up annoyed.  

            "Mr. Black, if you know these concepts so well that you don't feel you need to pay attention, please demonstrate for the class." she said irritably. 

            Sirius looked slightly bored as he pointed his wand at the matchstick Professor McGonagall gave him and said lazily _"transidium."_  To the shock of most of his classmates and the chagrin of Professor McGonagall, the match on his desk turned into a shiny silver needle.  

            "Thank you, Mr. Black." McGonagall said, even more stiffly than before.

            "Yes, ma'am" Sirius answered politely, grinning his crooked grin.  

The rest of the class muffled their laughter and tried to pay attention as Professor McGonagall instructed them to get out their quills to take notes before allowing them to attempt the spell.  Both James and Remus were able to get theirs to transform by the end of class, but they were the only ones.  The red-headed girl had caused hers to become pointed on one end, but everyone else's looked exactly the same as they had at the beginning of the class.  Professor McGonagall was extremely impressed at having two students accomplish the spell on their first day and another come close, so she awarded Gryffindor 30 points, but didn't give any for Sirius.  Sirius was normally good at charming adults to get out of trouble, but Professor McGonagall seemed immune to his winning smile and big blue eyes.  

            "I'm never going to get it." Peter murmured dejectedly as they headed towards their next class, Potions.

            "Don't worry about it." Remus advised him.  "We've all done this before, there's loads of people who come from Muggle families; you'll catch on soon enough.  Besides, I bet you do better than me at Potions"  

            To Sirius's great irritation, they had with the Slytherins, and to make matters worse the Potions teacher, Professor Smeral, was the head of Slytherin house and always favored his own students.  The four boys walked into the dungeon classroom to find Sirius's cousin Narcissa Black waiting for him.  Next to her was a boy with long, greasy black hair and a very large nose.  

            "Sirius, what would your mother say if she saw the filth you're associating with." Narcissa sneered, looking disgustedly at James's pink robes.

            James was about to say something to that, but Sirius was faster.  "You're calling _my_ friends filthy?  Your mother would faint if she saw _that slime ball's hair." he gestured toward the hook-nosed boy.  _

            Narcissa's reply was cut off by the teacher who chose that moment to enter and told them to sit down.

The four boys chose seats in the back of the class and got their cauldrons and supplies out as the teacher, who introduced himself as Professor Smeral, head of Slytherin House, sneered about how most of them would probably fail his class.  They were told to find a partner to work with as the directions for the potion appeared magically on the black board.  It was a very difficult potion and the smallest mistake would leave it useless, but if it was done correctly it would cure most types of colds.  

            Professor Smeral walked around the classroom, looking at the potions and making snide comments to most of the Gryffindors' while complimenting the Slytherins'.  "See how Mr. Snape's potion is turning a nice red color?  Twenty points to Slytherin."  Narcissa, who was partnered with Snape, the greasy-haired boy, turned around to smirk at Sirius.

            "What do you think would happen if I added a little bit of salamander blood instead of essence of newt?" James whispered, his eyes gleaming impishly.

            "It would cause a huge explosion, ruin your cauldron, waste our supplies, and land us in detention." Sirius answered gravely.  "Let's do it."

            Remus was too busy watching them and trying not to burst out laughing to pay attention to what he was doing, and he accidentally added twice the amount of toad hearts that the potion called for.  Peter, who was sharing Remus's cauldron squeaked and his eyes went wide just as the Potions classroom was rocked by two simultaneous explosions.

            "DETENTION!  All four of you, tonight with Mr. Filch!" the professor screeched.  "50 points from Gryffindor!"  Narcissa and the greasy-haired boy, Snape, were grinning maliciously.

            "But, Professor, we don't have 50 points." the redhead Gryffindor girl ventured nervously.

            "Well then, I suppose I can take however many points you do have and make it a WEEK of detentions, and Ms. Evans can join them tonight for speaking without permission." Professor Smeral snarled.

            At the end of class they were told to put a sample of their potion in a test tube to turn in.  Remus, James, Sirius, and Peter all got zeros for not having anything to turn in, and even Evans got one for talking back to the Professor.  As they left the class, she glared daggers at the four boys.

            "What in Merlin's name is her problem, it's not like we told her to go and talk back to the teacher."  Sirius fumed after Evans shoved angrily past him.

            James laughed.  "And why did you guys blow yours up?" he asked, turning to Remus and Peter, "Wanted to join us in detention?"

            "As much as I wanted to spend my first night at school with Filch, no, I just got distracted.  I'm horrible at potions." Remus answered.

            "That much we can tell." Sirius laughed as he mussed Remus's light hair and the four headed off toward Gryffindor Tower for their break period.  When they crawled through the round opening in the wall into Gryffindor common room, they saw Evans talking to Krissy about what had happened.

            "Come on, Lily, you gotta admit the look on Smeral's face was pretty funny." Krissy was saying.

            "They're a bunch of immature little children playing stupid pranks." Lily fumed.

            "Aw, they're not that bad..." Krissy broke off as she suddenly noticed who had just entered the common room.  Lily turned and her gaze darkened.  "I hope you enjoyed your little prank." she spat before turning on her heel and running up the stairs to the girls' dormitories.  

            "Don't mind Lily, she's just upset about the detention." Krissy told them.  "She's afraid of what her parents will think when they find out she got detention on her first day of school."

            After two more classes, they all made their way to the Great Hall for lunch.  They were filling their plates and talking about what classes they had left when a dark-haired girl who was obviously related to Sirius and Bellatrix walked over from the Ravenclaw table.  She didn't have Bellatrix's cold beauty, but her dark eyes held a warmth that Bellatrix lacked and her smile lit up her face, making her pretty in a different way.

            "Hey Sirius, how's your first day at Hogwarts going?" she asked.

            "Already got detention." he answered brightly.

            She laughed.  "Oh, Sirius, what are we going to do with you?  That must be a school record; detention after only four classes.  Let me guess you got on Professor Smeral's bad side."

            Sirius grinned at her.  "It was only the second class of the day, but yeah, for some reason he got really pissed off when our cauldrons exploded." He said innocently.

            The girl laughed again.  "Don't worry about it.  He was probably just looking for an excuse to give you a detention.  Smeral's in Bella's pocket; she's his favorite student and I think he has a thing for her.  It's not reciprocated, of course, as bad as she can be, Bella does have some morals."

            "Nah, she doesn't have morals, she just wouldn't risk the family reputation and her own name to get better grades.  She doesn't need them anyway." he responded darkly.

            "Sirius" the girl said pleadingly.  "I know you don't get along, but she's my sister.  Can't you at least _try to be civil?"_

            "No"

            The girl looked like she was going to say something else, but she obviously didn't want to start an argument, so she turned to the other boys.  "Hi, I'm Andromeda.  I'm Sirius's cousin."

            The boys introduced themselves and Andromeda asked how their classes were going.

            "Well, we're all in detention with Sirius for the next week, but other than that it's been going good." James answered.

Andromeda laughed again.  "So Sirius has finally found some friends who love getting into trouble as much as he does, huh?  Well, I hope it's not too bad, Smeral can be a real ass sometimes.  I'll see you guys around.  Bye Sirius, and be careful, Bella's still livid about that little stunt you pulled on the train and you know how she can get."

"I'm not afraid of her, but thanks for the warning.  See ya later Andromeda." Sirius called as she walked away.

"She's my favorite cousin." he told the others.  "She's cool even though she sticks up for her sisters too much.  I think she's kinda scared to really stand up to them.  I can't blame her though, Bellatrix can be downright evil."

Peter hadn't been on the train with the other three and he didn't understand what was going on.  "So what's so bad about your family?" he asked.

"The fact that they're a bunch of dark wizards who believe that the fact that their blood has been totally pure for centuries gives them the right to decide who should live and die." Sirius said derisively.

"What do you mean pure blood?" 

"It means no one in their family has Muggle blood." James said, his lip curling slightly.  "And that they believe they are better than everyone else and Muggle-borns should be killed to clean out the gene pool."

"Exactly." Sirius said.  "Although most of them won't actually come out and say that.  They just say that the gene pool "needs cleansing."  Bellatrix is one of the few who admits that the only way to do that is to kill anyone who isn't pure blooded enough to fit their standards.  They're all followers of Lord Voldemort.  When they find out that I'm hanging out with you three instead of Lucius Malfloy and his gang, there'll be hell to pay." his eyes suddenly went wide.   "I know what Bella's gonna do.  She'll have my mum send a Howler." he paled slightly.

James and Remus looked at hum sympathetically and James suggested "Maybe you shouldn't come down to the Great Hall for breakfast.  Stay in Gryffindor Tower, than at least the rest of the school won't hear."

"What's a Howler?" Peter asked

"No, if I do that, Bella will know she got to me.  Better to just take it like a man.  You guys don't have to come though, she'll say some nasty stuff about you three and I wont blame you if you don't wanna be there to hear it."

"Don't worry, mate, we'll be there for you." James assured him.  Remus nodded his agreement.

"What's a Howler?" Peter repeated.

"It's a letter that screams at you." Remus explained.

"You'll see tomorrow morning." Sirius said heavily.  "Well, we'd better get going, don't wanna be late for Charms."


	4. Detention

That evening after dinner, the four boys reported to Filch, the caretaker, for their detentions to find that Lily Evans was already there.  Filch was a Squibb, and he hated all the students because they would one day become wizards.  He was a horribly ugly man with tallow skin and filthy hair, when he smiled his thin lips pulled back from crooked yellow teeth.

"Smeral warmed me about you four." he jeered.  "Told me to separate you two," he pointed at James and Sirius, "and you two." then at Remus and Peter.  Filch's lips curled back from yellow teeth in a sneer.  "You," he pointed to Remus and Sirius, "will be cleaning out the toilets on the second floor.  And you" there he jabbed a finger toward James, Peter and Lily, "will be cleaning bed pans in the hospital wing. WITHOUT MAGIC!" he cackled gleefully.  "Wont be breaking any more rules now, will you!  Well, get to it!"

The five Gryffindors split up and Filch's cat, Mrs. Norris, followed James and his group while Filch shooed Sirius and Remus up the stairs.  He stood over them for a few minutes while they scrubbed toilet bowls, but finally left to prowl around for more students breaking rules.  As soon as the bathroom door closed behind him, Sirius threw his toilet brush against the far wall and turned to Remus.  

"So what mayhem could we cause tonight?" he asked, an evil glitter coming into his eyes.

"Isn't one week of detentions enough for you?" Remus asked, shaking his head in mock exasperation.

"Of course not.  It's our first day at school; we have to give dear Filch something to remember us by."

Remus laughed.  "Ok, but we have to plan it so we won't be caught in the act this time."

"Alright.  So what do you have in mind?" 

Remus came up with a plan while Sirius bewitched their toilet brushes to clean while they were away.

"Ok, is the coast clear?" Remus asked as Sirius stuck his head out the bathroom door.

"Yeah, I don't seem him anywhere.  That damn cat's probably still with James, so I think we're safe."

The two boys crept out of the bathroom and down the hall until they came to a hidden passage that they had heard about from some of the other Gryffindors.  Sirius counted out three bricks to the right of the window and four from the floor and pressed the brick in.  A door opened in the previously solid wall and they slipped into a dark passage.  They followed it all the way to the hallway on the fifth floor that lead to the Ravenclaw dormitories.  Remus checked to make sure it was deserted before the two of them snuck down the corridor, staying out of sight of the portrait that guarded Ravenclaw Tower.  

"Still got the Dungbombs?" he whispered.

Sirius nodded and pulled out the packages of Dungbombs that he had bought of a Gryffindor fourth year at dinner.  They spread the bombs out all over the corridor, checked to make sure there was no one in sight and lit them.  As soon as all the fuses had been lighted, they threw caution to the winds and sprinted as fast as they could back to the secret passage.  The door had just closed behind them when they heard the small explosion and shouts from the Ravenclaws piling out of their common room to see what was going on.  They didn't slow down until they were back inside the bathroom on the second floor, where they collapsed in a fit of laughter.  They had just gotten control of themselves, picked up their toilet brushes and began to clean manually when the door crashed open and Filch came in, his faced red with fury.

"You, you… What have you been up to?" he spluttered.

The boys put schooled their faces into expressions of innocent confusion.  "What do you mean, Mr. Filch?" Remus asked politely.  "We've been cleaning toilets like you told us to."  Filch knew they were lying, but he had no proof and he couldn't hand out extra detentions based on the fact that he didn't like the students, so he just turned and stalked out cursing to himself.  

"Mr. Filch, can we go yet?" Sirius called after him.  The caretaker just made a strangled noise in his throat as he disappeared out of sight.  "Well, he didn't say no." 

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

Meanwhile, James was in the hospital wing arguing with Lily Evans.  Madam Pomfrey, the nurse, was in her office, and the Gryffindors were alone in the room.

"I cannot believe I got detention the first day of school!  My parents are going to kill me.  This is all your fault, Potter!" Lily screamed as she threw down the bed pan she'd been scrubbing.

"_My_ fault?  I didn't tell you to talk back to the professor.  Maybe if you weren't such a know-it-all, Evans, you wouldn't be here!" James yelled back.

Lily's face turned almost as red as her hair.  "Honestly! And I'm sure you think you're totally innocent here!"

"I never said I was innocent, but I'm not responsible for anyone but myself."

"You all think you're so funny.  Well, I have news for you; that was the most childish stunt I've seen in years!"

"Oh really, then why were all your friends laughing so hard?" 

"You do everything for attention, don't you?"

"Someone has to do it, or we'd all die of boredom." he shrugged.

Lily got up in a huff and stalked to the other end of the hospital wing, where she plopped down on a bed and began scrubbing furiously.  James rolled his eyes at Peter, but Peter was slightly frightened of the redhead's  temper so he just smiled slightly.  As James continued scrubbing, he found himself wishing that Sirius and Remus were there; Peter was okay, but he just wasn't as much fun.

A/N: sorry it's so short!  More later


	5. The Howler

            The next morning Sirius's good mood had disappeared at the prospect of getting a Howler from his mother in the middle of the crowded Great Hall, but he was still determined not to hide.  James was slightly grumpy that Sirius and Remus had gotten to have some fun the night before while he had been forced to listen to Lily Evans rant at him.  The four boys were unusually quiet as they walked down to breakfast.  Sirius filled his plate as usual, but didn't actually eat anything because he was too busy watching nervously for the owls.  Finally they came; hundreds of owls carrying letters, packages of forgotten items, and bags of treats from mothers who seemed to believe that their children wouldn't be fed properly at school.  Sirius just sighed as his owl, Nightshade landed in front of him with a red envelope in her mouth.  The owl seemed to be aware of what she was carrying because she hooted apologetically when Sirius took the Howler from her, and nibbled consolingly on his hand.  Other people had noticed the Howler and were whispering and pointing.  Sirius looked down at the envelope in his hand, breathed deeply to try to steel himself for what was coming, and opened the envelope before it started to smoke.  

            A woman's angry voice filled the Great Hall, magically magnified to hundreds of times its normal volume.  "SIRIUS BLACK, YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO YOUR FAMILY!  ONE DAY AT HOGWARTS AND YOU HAVE ALREADY SLANDERED YOUR FAMILY NAME, DIRTIED YOUR REPUTATION, BEEN PUT IN _GRYFFINDOR, BROKE A HUNDRED-YEAR-OLD FAMILY TRADITION, AND GOTTEN A DETENTION!  YOU ARE A BLOOD TRAITOR AND AN EMBARRASSMENT TO PURE BLOODED WIZARDS EVERYWHERE.  YOU HAVE IGNORED OUR WISHES THAT YOU SOCIALLIZE ONLY WITH CHILDREN FROM _RESPECTABLE_ FAMILIES AND LOOK WHAT IT GOT YOU: DETENTION ON YOUR FIRST DAY!   YOU BRING SHAME AND DISHONOR TO THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!"_

            The Slytherin table sniggered, as did some people from other tables who didn't understand the true meaning of Mrs. Black's words.  Sirius's face was nearly as red as the scarlet Gryffindor tablecloth, but not from embarrassment.  He was furious at his mother, at Bellatrix, at all the Blacks who believed that their blood made them better than everyone else, at all purebloods who believed that anyone with Muggle blood should not be allowed to attend wizard schools or be a part of the magical world, and most of all he was enraged that his new friends had had to hear what his mother had to say about them.  He crumpled up the Howler, and began viciously eating the food in front of him, trying to act like his mother's words hadn't gotten to him.

            After breakfast they all walked toward their first class of the day, which, to Sirius's fury, was double Potions.  "Wow that was the most amazing thing I've ever seen!" Peter babbled.  "It was so loud, and so real-sounding; not all fuzzy like a recording."

            Sirius turned on him.  "You think that was cool?  Do you have any fucking idea what that bitch was saying about you?" he snarled.  "Or did it all go straight over your head?"

            "Hey," James jumped to Peter's defense as the smaller boy made a frightened whimpering sound, "don't take it out on him.  He doesn't understand about the whole pureblood crap."

            Sirius sighed and some of the anger drained from his face.  "Sorry, Pete.  It's just you have no idea what it's like.  That Howler was the politically correct version of what she wanted to say.  In private she doesn't sugar-coat anything that way.  My whole family is a bunch of racist gits, and just because you're my friends you have to bear the brunt of their hatred.  I'm really sorry for that."

            "Hey, it's alright.  It's not your fault." James assured him.

            "Yeah, we know you're not like them.  Trust me I'd be the last person to judge a book by its cover." Remus agreed.

            They had arrived at the Potions room, and although Sirius wasn't happy about having to be in a room with his cousin Narcissa, especially not for two hours, he was determined to put up a brave face and he walked through the door with his head up and shoulders square as though nothing had happened.  All his good intentions were ruined, however, by the fact that the professor was gone and Narcissa was waiting for him with a sneer on her face and Snape standing next to her again.

            "Poor Sirius, is Mummy mad at you again?" Narcissa mocked.

            "A Black hanging out with Mudbloods and blood-traitors; what is the world coming to?" Snape sneered, his upper lip curling.  

            "Don't you ever talk about my friends that way." Sirius growled.

Just then the door opened and the teacher walked in.

            "What is going on here?" he snarled.

            "Nothing, Professor." Narcissa spoke up.

            "Then get in your seats and I don't want to see you picking fights in my class again." he spat at the Gryffindors, ignoring the fact that Narcissa and Snape were just as guilty.

            The four Gryffindors took their seats as far away from Snape and Narcissa as they could get.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            Their first weekend finally came around, but the students were trapped inside due to a terrible storm and gale force winds.  The four boys lounged around the Gryffindor common room, staying close to the fire for warmth.  They had a week's worth of homework to catch up on due to their detentions, but no one was in the mood to study.  Sirius reclined in an old, comfy armchair with his Potions book open on his lap, but he was staring absently into the lames.  James was doodling on a piece of parchment instead of writing his Transfiguration essay, and Peter was watching over his shoulder.  Remus had gotten the farthest with his books open on the floor and his parchment and quill out, but he was laying with his head propped on his arms, staring sullenly out the window into the storm.

            "Our first day off, and we have to stay inside and do our homework.  This sucks." Sirius complained.

            "Yeah, I don't feel like studying right now." James agreed

            "Do you ever?" Remus feigned surprise.

            "Shut up, Remy.  I'm hungry, anyone wanna come with me down to the kitchens?" James asked, pushing his chair back from the table he was sitting at.

            "I don't think they'll just give us food." Peter said

            "Of course they won't, what would be the fun in that?" James replied.  

            Sirius raised an eyebrow, "And just how are you planning to get in and out of the kitchens without anyone seeing you?" 

"I think its time to let you boys in on a little secret.  Come with me."  James said as he hopped up and sprinted up the stairs toward their dorm.

"Totally nutters." Sirius shook his head as he got up to follow James upstairs.

"He's not the only one." Remus answered as he pushed himself up off the floor and scooped up all his books.

"Me?" Sirius put a hand to his heart with a mockingly hurt expression.  "When have I ever claimed to be sane?"  Remus and Peter laughed as they walked into the dorm to find James rummaging around in his suitcase.  He stood up with something in his hands that looked like liquid silver made into a material.

"My most prized possession." he said as he unfolded it. "Got it for my birthday last year."

Sirius gasped. "An Invisibility Cloak!"

James grinned as he pulled the cloak over his shoulders and disappeared.  Peter squeaked in surprise as they eyed the spot where James had been standing. 

"This is how we'll get our food without being caught." James's voice spoke out of thin air on the opposite side of the room from where he'd been standing.  He pulled the cloak off and the other three hurried over to him.  They pulled the cloak over all four of them and turned to the mirror to make sure none of their body parts were sticking out.  

"Just think of all the mischief we could cause with this thing!" Sirius whispered excitedly. "And we'd never get detention 'cause no one would know it was us!"

They made their way down into the crowded common room, careful not to tread on anyone's toes, and toward the kitchens.  A floor above the kitchens they found Mrs. Norris prowling the halls, looking for an excuse for getting some kid in trouble.  It was too good of an opportunity to  miss, so as they walked by her James reached out, making sure his foot was still covered by the invisibility cloak, and kicked her hard enough to send her flying with a startled 'meeeeooooooowwwwww.'  The landed on her feet and immediately spun around to see who had kicked her.  When she found just empty air, she spun again, looking like she was chasing her tail.  The boys muffled their laughter as they hurried away.  

"Did you see that?" James cackled as soon as they were far enough away to be out of earshot, even for a cat. "I didn't know cats chased their tails!"

"Shoulda kicked her harder, mate.  Really giver her something to yowl about." Sirius said, stuffing his fist in his mouth to muffle his laughter.

Once they had gotten their food and were back in the hall that they had found Mrs. Norris in, they saw Filch creeping around talking to the cat.  "Are you sure you didn't see anything, my sweet?" he asked in his oily voice. "Those goddamn marauders couldn't have gotten far.  Where did they go?"

"Marauders." whispered Remus, "I like that."

"Does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" James agreed as they crept away from Filch and returned to Gryffindor Tower.  

The common room was still packed full of people, so they had to be careful not to step on anyone and cause a panic.  As they walked past Lily Evans and her friends, James fought the urge to do something to piss her off.  They climbed the stairs to their dorm, and to their relief, it was empty.  They took the cloak off, piled all the sweets and pastries they had stolen onto one of the beds, and burst out laughing about Filch and Mrs. Norris.  They decided that from then on they would call themselves 'The Marauders' in honor of Filch.

A/N: I know those two passages don't quite go together, but they were too short to put by themselves.  Special thanks to Craymere for the review!  It was a great ego boost! ^_^


	6. Purebloods and Bullies

A/N: Ok, here's chapter 6, and I'm not sure whether I'm gonna keep going or not, so please review and tell me if I should!

James stretched sleepily as he reached for his clothes.  It was Monday morning and he didn't really feel like facing two whole hours of being bored to death in Herbology.  He cast around for some extra Dungbombs or something to take with him and make the day more interesting when something hit him on the side of the head.  He turned to see Sirius grinning at him and was about to make a scathing remark when he saw what it was that Sirius had hit him with; a package of Dungbombs.  

He looked up at his friend, his crooked grin a mirror image of the one looking back at him.  It was amazing how alike their minds were.  Sirius turned away and threw the towel he was wearing on the floor while he rummaged in his trunk for some clean robes.  James shook his head, the boy had no shame.

James heard a startled yell from the bathroom, and turned to see Peeves the poltergeist come zooming out with Peter's boxers on his head.  He did a summersault in mid-air and caught sight of the only occupied bed in the room, Remus's.  Frank Longbottom had gotten up early for once and had already left for the Great Hall.  Peter came running out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist as Peeves ripped back the curtains on Remus's four-poster.  

The short little man floated down so that his wide mouth was just inches from the sleeping boy's ear and suddenly burst into song.

"Loony, loopy Lupin!  Loony, loopy, Lupin!" 

The growl that came from within the four-poster bed made the other boys in the dorm wonder if Remus kept a vicious dog in his bed, but it was Remus himself that emerged, swinging at Peeves and trying to get free of his blankets.  Peeves zoomed backwards cackling as Remus fell on the floor, trying to run after the poltergeist with his legs still wrapped in the sheets.

"Hey! Come back here, I need those!" Peter yelled as Peeves flew out the door still wearing Peter's boxers on his head.  Peeves's only reply was to blow a loud raspberry as he disappeared into the common room.

James and Sirius laughed at the sight of their friends; one messy-haired and half asleep, sitting on the floor trapped in his bed sheets, yelling obscenities at Peeves , and the other wearing nothing but a towel, and shaking a fist at the empty air.  Their laughter seemed to wake Remus up the rest of the way, and he began to chuckle along with them.

"Morning, guys." he said as he disentangled himself and stood.

"That it is, Remy.  I was beginning to wonder if you'd sleep all day." Sirius teased.

"Yeah, lucky Peeves came along." James chortled, "I sure wouldn't wanna wake you up."

Remus made a low growling sound in his throat, "Damn poltergeist." But he returned James's smile.

"I guess it's about time for breakfast." he said, glancing at the clock.

Sirius raised an eyebrow. "I'd say its time to get showered and dressed first, mate." 

"I'm not the one standing around in my birthday suit, Siri." he retorted.

Sirius looked down and shrugged.  "I'm still one step ahead of you, my friend."

Remus just rolled his eyes as he headed off to the shower.  Fifteen minutes later, much more awake now that they'd had breakfast, the Marauders headed out of the castle toward the greenhouse where they had Herbology which was, unfortunately, with the Slytherins this week.  Normally the Marauders messed around in Professor Sprout's class just because it was the only way to keep their sanity as she bored them with the virtues of skindleweed and root of oleander, but today they had another source of amusement.

Severus Snape was sitting two rows in front of them, and he seemed to be the only person in the class actually paying attention when Professor Sprout asked what the uses of different plants were.  He was sitting on the front edge of his chair, raising his hand as high as he could, and eagerly listing all the different potions that could be made out of the plants they were studying.  He didn't notice the disdainful looks he was receiving from Gryffindors and Sytherins alike.  Narcissa Black, who usually partnered with Snape in Potions in order to receive full marks, was looking down her pinched nose at him as though he were some kind of disgusting insect she had stepped on.  Slytherins had a reputation of being cold and aloof, and they didn't seem to be taking lightly to Snape ruining that reputation.

"Oh, Professor, I have no life so I memorized the entire contents of the potions workbook!" Sirius mimicked as Snape correctly answered yet another question.

The Gryffindors snickered, except for Lily Evans who spoke up indignantly.

"He knows more about potions than you ever will." she said coolly.

Sirius raised an eyebrow.  "And why would I want to waste my time memorizing which root you need to cure hookworm or something?  Unlike that slime ball," he motioned to Snape, "I don't touch other people's shit."

"Besides" James added, "Who needs potions?  Sirius could hex Snape into next Thursday."

"And I suppose you think that gives you the right to pick on him?  You're nothing but a big bully."

"Oh, I'm hurt." Sirius said, putting a hand over his heart dramatically.  The other Gryffindors chuckled.

"Now, Sirius," Remus cut in mock-reproachfully, "look at it from his point of view.  If you looked like Snape, you'd be interested in potions too.  I'm surprised he hasn't used a Shrinking Solution on his nose yet."

"And I seriously doubt soap and water could take care of that hair if he ever decided to wash it." Peter added.

The Gryffindors roared with laughter, receiving dark glares from the Slytherins who'd overheard them.  Even though the Slytherins were annoyed with Snape at the moment, they would always jump at a chance to send evil gazes (and normally insults, too) at Gryffindors.  Only Snape and Professor Sprout seemed unaware of the conversation going on in the back of the class.

"Now it really isn't that funny that rythuse blossoms can be used to cure diarrhea." Professor Sprout said, slightly annoyed, "I'm sure you've all had it at one time and if you come from a wizard family, you were probably given a potion made from rythuse to cure it.  I must ask you to be more mature."

"Sorry, Professor." they chorused, trying to hold back their laughter.

The bell rang and the Gryffindors piled out of the greenhouse still making fun of Snape as they made their way toward McGonagall's room for Transfiguration.  As soon as they were out of earshot of the Slytherins, Lily turned on the Marauders again.

"You four think you're so funny, picking on him like that.  It's not like he can help what he looks like!" she shouted.

"He could take a shower occasionally." Sirius said.

"Some people have oily hair; not everyone's born with perfect locks like you and your cousins." Lily snarled.

The tall boy's face darkened dangerously; the surest way to piss off Sirius Black was to liken him to his family in any way.

James cut in before Sirius could really loose his temper.  "Look, Evans, you don't understand.  Ironically enough it's the Muggle-borns who don't understand just how horrible people like Snape are." he said quietly in a somber voice that was completely out of character.

"That doesn't give you the right to pick on him." she insisted.

"Come on, Lily, let's go." a short girl named Alice said softly.

"No, I'm not just going to shut up and watch them make fun of that poor boy behind his back.  I don't care what house he's in, it's not right."

"Lily." Alice said more firmly, "We're going to be late."

At the stubborn expression on the redhead's face, Krissy Miller stepped forward and took her gently by the arm and steered her away from the rest of the group.

"Come on, we'll explain." she said as she and Alice led a fuming Lily down the hall.

When they reached their class Lily was already there, seated between Krissy and Alice, who were talking quietly to her.  She had calmed down slightly, but if the glares she sent at the Marauders were any indication, she still didn't believe their actions were justified.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            A few days later Remus, James and Sirius were heading off toward Potions chatting about how they had put a bull's eye on Professor McGonagall's butt in Transfiguration (and gotten another week of detentions). The look on her face had been well worth it though. Peter had gone ahead of them to return a book that he had borrowed from a Ravenclaw boy in Care of Magical Creatures, and when the three Marauders reached the bottom of the stairs near the Potions dungeon they saw Malfloy and Snape standing in the corridor.  As usual, Malfloy was flanked by his two bodyguards who were currently glaring and cracking their knuckles at Peter while he cowered on the ground in front of Malfloy.

            "P-please give me my book." They heard Peter stutter.   

            "Oh don't worry, you'll get your book back." sneered Malfloy as he ripped a handful of pages out of it.  Snape snickered.  

            "Give him the book, Malfloy." Sirius snarled as he withdrew his wand.

            Malfloy whirled around, an evil grin spreading across his face.  "Well, well, if it isn't the noble Sirius Black and his little sidekicks.  Looks like your friends are here to rescue you, Mudblood." Malfloy drawled at Peter.

            "Don't you _ever call him that, Malfloy." James said.  His voice had gone deathly quiet and his face had gone pale with rage._

            "Are you threatening me, _Potty?" Malfloy scoffed as Crabbe and Goyle turned on James.  Snape's beady eyes were glittering with anticipation, but before Crabbe and Goyle could reach James, the three Marauders had their wands out.  _

            _"Petrificus Totalus" _they bellowed simultaneously, it was the most recent curse they had learned in Defense Against the Dark Arts, and with all three of them doing it at once, Crabbe and Goyle were not only instantly paralyzed, but also thrown back into the wall behind them with a sickening thud. 

            Snape paled and began to back away nervously as Remus bent down to help Peter up, but Malfloy reached for his wand and pointed it at Sirius.

            "Watch yourself, Black.  You don't know who you're messing with." he drawled.

            Before Malfloy could hex Sirius, James shouted _"Expelliarmus!" _and Malfloy's wand arced out of his hand towards James who caught it deftly.  Suddenly the silence was broken by a soft meow behind them.

            The Marauders turned to see Filch walking up, a maniacal glee on his face and his scrawny cat at his heels.  "Eight detentions today!" He seemed ready to skip with joy. "We'll see if the Headmaster won't allow me to bend the rules and hang you up by your toenails in my office." he snickered.  

            Sirius and James exchanged amused looks (that was exactly the punishment they had imagined) and Sirius even let out a bark of laughter.  "Do you find this amusing?" Filch demanded angrily.  Malfloy and Snape snickered, and Filch turned on them.  "How about you?  I have plenty of manacles to go around!" he yelled.

            Professor Smeral poked his head out of his room to see what all the commotion was about.  "What's going on, Filch?  These five," he said pointing at Snape and the Marauders, "are supposed to be in my class right now."  

            "Caught them fighting, Professor.  Detentions for all of them."

            "It looks to me like four Gryffindors hexing my students." Smeral sneered.

            "No, sir." Filch disagreed, "Saw the whole thing, they were definitely provoked."  Even though they knew Filch was only standing up for them because he wanted to put as many students in detention as he could, they Gryffindors were fighting back smirks when Smeral spoke again.  He seemed unable to find any other way of getting his students off, so he resorted to acting angry about being interrupted.

            "Fine then." he snapped. "You can deal with them later, these students need to get to class or I will mark them all tardy."


	7. Suspicions

            A/N: Craymere, u really know how to boost a girl's ego.  Thanks for the review, I feel loved!  *blushes* So here's the next part!

James, Peter and Sirius were sitting around a table in the Gryffindor common room, helping each other write essays for Transfiguration and History of Magic.  Or rather, James was helping Peter and Sirius was alternately staring out the window and doodling on his Transfiguration notes.

"So the Goblin Rebellion was in China in the 1800's?" Peter sounded more confused than is seemed possible to be about dates.

            "No, that was the Boxer Rebellion." James corrected, "The Goblin Rebellion was in France."  They continued muttering about dates and famous wizards like Oric the Ugly.

            "Has anyone seen Remus lately?" Sirius asked suddenly.

            James frowned.  "I haven't seen him since before dinner.  He said he wasn't feeling well so he went to see Madam Pomfrey."

            "Yeah, but that was hours ago.  Madam Pomfrey should have fixed him up by now, unless there's something seriously wrong with him." Sirius said thoughtfully.  "Let's go see him."

            "It's almost eight o'clock.  We'll have to be quick about it." Peter said as they cleared the table.  It took them a little longer than they expected to find the hospital wing because the staircases kept moving on them, and when they finally got there it was a quarter past eight.  They knocked on the door of the hospital wing and a plump witch with a friendly smile opened the door.  "What can I do for you dears?  You're not all sick are you?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

            "No ma'am," Sirius spoke up, "we're looking for our friend Remus Lupin.  He came up here a few hours ago saying he wasn't feeling well and we were wondering if he was alright.  We were really worried, I've heard that you can cure anything in a couple of minutes, and he's been gone for awhile now."

            "He'll be just fine." Madam Pomfrey smiled at them. "I'll let him know you came to see him."

            "Can we just go say hello?  I promise we won't disturb anyone." Sirius asked politely.

            "I'm sorry, boys, but Remus needs his sleep.  He'll be fine by tomorrow.  You'd better get back to your dormitories, or Filch will be very angry with you.  Go on now." she said as she shooed them away with a smile and a wave of her hand.

            The three marauders frowned at each other.  "He was a bit pale today, but he didn't look sick enough to warrant him staying over night in the hospital wing." James said, slightly confused.  

            "Yeah, well I guess we'll just have to ask him about it tomorrow." Sirius said with a frown. "Oh well, come on, there's nothing we can do tonight and Madam Pomfrey sounded perfectly confident that Remus'll be ok.  I need to write that essay for McGonagall." 

            "You'd be done by now if you had been working earlier instead of messing around." Peter reminded him

            "Oh, leave me alone, I know all this crap there's no reason for me to do all of the homework."

            "I don't think McGonagall will accept that excuse." James said. 

            Sirius just made a face and they made their way back to Gryffindor Tower bantering good-naturedly.

            The next day, Remus was indeed back.  When they arrived in Defense Against the Dark Arts for their first class, he was already seated in the back, waiting for them.  He smiled at them as they took their seats, his normally handsome face was more pale than usual and he looked exhausted; there were bags under his eyes, which were red and bloodshot.  

"Damn, Remus, what happened to you?" Sirius asked in a more worried tone than he had had at any point the night before.  "You musta been really sick."

"Nah, I think I just had an allergic reaction to something in the potion Madam Pomfrey gave me." he said, not quite meeting Sirius's eyes.

Sirius and James exchanged skeptical looks, but before they could question him further, Professor Flitwick appeared and told them to take their seats.

Sirius's interest was piqued again when the light-haired boy reached for his quill.  His wrist and the back of his hand had dark lines across them, as though Remus had had a fairly bad wound there that had been mended by Madam Pomfrey.  Remus saw what Sirius was looking at and quickly shrugged his sleeves down over his hand.  Sirius looked up into a pair of nervous amber eyes that were silently begging him not to say anything.  His own eyes narrowed suspiciously, but he relented and didn't mention anything out loud.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            Eventually, between homework, pranks, detentions with Filch, and Quidditch practices that James and Sirius loved to watch even though first years weren't allowed on the team, they forgot about Remus's peculiar illness and his refusal to talk about it.  The first two months of school flew by and November came, along with Quidditch games and horrible weather.  The first game of the year was Gryffindor versus Hufflepuff, and the entire school came out to watch despite the hurricane weather.  Slytherin had won the Quidditch Cup for the past five years running, and everyone was hoping for a Gryffindor victory to unseat the Syltherins.  It was raining so hard that they could hardly see the players on their broomsticks, so James and Sirius spent most of the game explaining the rules of Quidditch to Peter, who was fascinated, and Remus who wasn't interested at all.  

            "There's 4 balls, the Quaffle, the two Bludgers, and the Golden Snitch." Sirius explained.

            "The Chasers score by getting the Quaffle (the big red one) past the Keeper and into the goal posts." James added

            "I can't even see the players, let alone the ball." Peter laughed.

            "Oh well, just listen to the commentary." Sirius suggested as the announcer informed them that Gryffindor was in possession. "Anyway, the two Bludgers (the black ones) try to knock players off their brooms.  There's two Beaters on each team to try to protect their teammates from the Bludgers and knock the other team of their brooms."

            "And there's the Golden Snitch.  It's this little tiny ball with wings that flies around the field.  The Seeker is the one who has to find and catch the Snitch, which ends the game.  It also gives that Seeker's team a hundred and fifty points." James added.

            "Wow this is so much cooler than Muggle sports." Peter said excitedly.  "They only play with one ball, and it never moves of its own accord.  Quidditch is like a mixture of basketball and baseball on broomsticks!"

            "What's baseball?" Sirius asked.

            "And basketball?" James added.

            "Oh, I saw a bunch of Muggles playing basketball in a park once." Sirius said as he launched into a hilarious story about how these six Muggle boys chased an orange ball that didn't move on its own back and forth down the court.

            Suddenly the crowd around them went silent as the announcer said "It looks like Michael Daily, the Gryffindor Seeker has seen the Snitch!  Hufflepuff Seeker Derek sees it, too, but Daily has too much of a head start.  Hufflepuff in the lead with 90 to 50, but Daily catches the Snitch to put Gryffindor in the lead.  GRYFFINDOR WINS 200 TO 90!"

            "And that, my friend, is why the Snitch is so important." James said, throwing his arm around Peter's shoulders as all the Gryffindors cheered.

            As they made their way back into the castle, James pulled them away from the cheering Gryffindors who were going upstairs to party in the Gryffindor common room.  "I heard about this really great secret passage from a couple of Hufflepuff fourth years." he whispered. "It's behind that big mirror on the fourth floor, and it leads straight into Hogsmeade." His eyes were twinkling with excitement.  "You guys up for it?"

            "Always." Sirius replied, his eyes shining with anticipation.  

            "Why do I get myself into these things?" Remus asked philosophically.

            "Aww, come on, you know you love breaking rules just as much as _I do." Sirius teased him as he threw an arm around Remus's shoulder._

            "It's not the rule breaking that's a problem it's the weeks of detention we get after every one of your stunts." Remus grunted as he followed his friends up to Gryffindor Tower to get James's Invisibility Cloak.

            "Hope you boys brought your money." James whispered as they slipped through the passage on the fourth floor.

            "I brought tons." Sirius said happily. "The one good thing about my family is that they're so obsessed about their image that they'll give me whatever I want just so people know they can afford it." he laughed. "Ironic, isn't it?" 

            The passage ended in a trapdoor what came out in an alley behind the Three Broomsticks.  Sirius let out a whoop and jumped in the air, while James spun around in a slow circle, murmuring about how he'd been looking forward to this all his life.

            "As touching as it is that your life's goal was to stand behind the Three Broomsticks and make a fool out of yourself, I'm thirsty; I'll see you three in the Three Broomsticks as soon as you're done catching flies in your mouths." Remus teased them.

            "Let's go to Zonko's first." James suggested.

            "We're right here, and this way we won't have to carry the bags around all day." Remus argued.

            "Always the logical one." Sirius teased.

            "Someone has to be." Remus said as he headed toward the front door.

James folded the Invisibility Cloak under his robes as they walked into the Three Broomsticks.  They took a seat near the back of the pub and the waitress brought them their butterbeers.  She was a beautiful young woman with the kind of body that inhabits the dreams of pubescent boys.  "If you need anything else, I'm Madam Rosemerta." she told them.

"I'm James Potter, this is Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew." James introduced.

"Nice to meet you.  Are you boys from Hogwarts?" she asked.

As James was trying to think up a convincing cover story, Sirius spoke up.  "Yeah, this is our first time in Hogsmeade."

Madam Rosemerta smiled.  "Shouldn't you be in school?" she asked without the slightest trace of disapproval in her voice.

Sirius shrugged, "There aren't any classes today, and Gryffindor just won the first Quidditch game, so we're out celebrating."

"Sounds like fun to me." Madam Rosemerta said, her eyes glittering merrily.  "So how do you boys like the village so far?"

"Well, the butterbeer's wonderful, we really haven't seen anything else." James answered.

She laughed. "Well, since this is a celebration, drinks are on the house.  Have fun in Hogsmeade, and good luck in getting the Quidditch Cup.  I'd hate to see Gryffindor loose to Slytherin." She winked at them, turned on her sparkly green heels and walked off to serve her other customers. 

They finished their butterbeers and headed towards Honeydukes sweet shop.  "How'd you know Madam Rosemerta wouldn't turn us in for sneaking out of the school?" Peter asked, his eyes wide and adoring, obviously thinking that Sirius was brilliant for how he handled the situation.

"Close your mouth before you catch a fly, Peter." Sirius teased, "She's a cocktail waitress; do you really think that she'd turn away business just because it's against school rules?  Besides she'd find out eventually if we'd lied to her, and that would probably piss her off worse than just sneaking out of the castle."

As they entered Honeydukes, he trailed off.  The store was filled wall to wall and ceiling to floor with the most delicious looking candy that any of them had ever seen.  There were shelves upon shelves of the world's finest chocolate, barrels of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans, aquariums fill of gummy worms that actually wriggled, quills made of pure sugar, and everything else imaginable.  Remus and Peter began filling bags with their favorite types of candy, while Sirius and James hurried off to the "Special Effect Sweets."  As they paid for their candy, Remus eyed the enormous bags James and Sirius were carrying warily.  He wasn't sure if he wanted to know what was in there.

Their next stop was Zonko's joke shop, and James and Sirius looked as though they had just died and gone to heaven.  "Did you see the Poison Ivy soap?  Or the Fainting  Flounders?" Sirius breathed excitedly as he looked up from a bin of fish- shaped candies that would make whoever ate them faint immediately.

"Look, only a Knut for a whole jar of itching powder!" James said delightedly.

Peter was looking between James and Sirius with a look of amazement on his face at all the things in the shop.  _He probably won't be so impressed when he wakes up one morning to find that they've put itching powder in his bed. _ Remus thought darkly as he made a mental note to beware of anything that might possibly be used against him.

They were late returning from Hogsmeade that night, and they had to be careful that no one heard the rustle of their bags as they snuck back to Gryffindor Tower.  When they finally got back in their room, Frank Longbottom was already sleeping, which suited the Marauders just fine as they emptied their pockets and bags full of wonderful things from Hogsmeade. 


	8. Pranks, Whomping Willows, and SNAPE TORT...

A/N: Thanks to KarenBloody for the wonderful review.  I swear you ppl r giving me an ego almost as big as James's!  Haha, and I just realized that the last like 4 chapters have had very little plot other than a few pranks, but then again I doubt there was anything vitally important that went on during the Marauders school years, and I don't feel like rewriting it.  Hope u like. ^_^

Professor McGonagall walked down the rows of desks, watching sternly as her students attempted to turn tea cups into tortoises.  "Very good, Miss Evans.  Try saying the spell a bit louder, Miss Thompson, and with more confidence.  Like this." she demonstrated the spell for a petite girl with black hair.

            The sound of breaking china caught her attention and she spun around to face Peter, who had broken his tea cup by hitting it too hard with his wand.  "Mr. Pettigrew!  You clumsy boy, how many times have I told you to be more careful??!!  You do not need to hit the cup as hard as you can!  A gentle tap will suffice." she stormed.

            "S-sorry Professor." Peter stuttered, cowering under McGonagall's anger.

            Sirius muffled a snigger in his hand, and she whirled on him.  "I suppose you find this funny, Mr. Black." she glared at Sirius's tortoise, whose shell was white with floral-patterned tea cups on it, just like the one the tortoise had been a few minutes before.

            Sirius, blinked innocently at the angry teacher. "I know you said no flowers, Professor, but are tea cups ok?" his big blue eyes formed an adorable puppy dog expression that could cause just about any teacher to forgive him.  Except McGonagall.

            Her eyes narrowed dangerously and she turned to James and Remus who were struggling valiantly not to laugh.  James had been miffed at her for giving him a pink tea cup instead of the Gryffindor scarlet one, so he had made his tortoise pink also.  Remus's tortoise looked perfectly normal, but he had just been muttering some kind of spell over it.

"You three think that just because you're very skilled wizards you don't need to follow the same rules that govern your peers.  If you disrupt my class again trying to be amusing, I will give you a week of detentions with Mr. Filch.  Are we clear?" 

"But Professor McGonagall, I haven't done anything!" Remus gasped, sounding shocked that she would even suggest such a thing, and giving her his best innocent look.  Remus seemed to be the only one whose charm had any effect on Professor McGonagall.  

She pursed her lips into a very thin line, but said "No, I suppose you haven't, this time at least."

She had hardly turned her back when Remus's tortoise opened its mouth, allowing a stream of hot tea to pour from it.  Remus's innocent look immediately turned impish as his friends glared at him for getting out of trouble.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

The first clear weekend of the year found the Marauders out of doors, sitting under a beech tree and discussing their latest illegal trip to Hogsmeade.  Sirius was surveying the grounds with a superior, bored look that made most girls giggle and say that he was 'soooo hott!'  Sirius couldn't stand sitting still and he got bored quicker than anyone his friends had ever met, unless he was pulling a prank that needed lots of planning.  Then he could become so wrapped up in his scheming that nothing but his growling stomach could disturb him.

            Suddenly his crystal blue eyes lit up, and a grin spread slowly across his face.  "Who's up for a bet?" he interrupted Peter who was babbling excitedly about all the sweets he had bought at Honeydukes.

            James's eyes lit up.  "What's the bet, mate?"

            "I bet I can get closer to the trunk of that Whomping Willow than any of you can." Sirius responded, smiling impishly.

            "You're on, we both know I have better reflexes." James said, jumping to his feet and heading off toward the Willow.

            "Just because I think there are better positions to play than Seeker, does NOT mean you are faster than me, James, my boy." Sirius disagreed as he sprang to his feet and chased after is best friend.

            Remus rolled his eyes. "They're both completely psychotic." he muttered more to himself than Peter as they followed the two black-haired boys at a more dignified pace.

            "Pool the cash." James told them as the two less enthusiastic boys reached them.  He and Sirius immediately began emptying their pockets onto the ground.  

            Remus raised an eyebrow as he dug into his own pockets for the change he had won from James in their last bet.  "Sir, as much as we love you, I don't think anyone wants your old Droobles Blowing Gum or the feathers off your quill." 

            Sirius made a face at him as he continued to dump all the trash in his pockets in the pile.  "Well then I guess you don't want these left-over Dungbombs, either." he teased as he pulled a few Zonko's products out of his pockets.

            By the time Sirius finished searching his pockets, they had attracted quite a crowd and other boys were adding to the pile, some even wanted to join them in trying to win it.

            "Ok" James called. "On three; one… two… three!"

            The boys all darted forward.  Peter tripped over his own feet and fell flat on his face, nearly avoiding a blow to the head from the tree.  A few kids received glancing blows as they dodged too late, and one Ravenclaw doubled over as he took a hit directly in the stomach.  Remus, James, Sirius, and two other boys were still dancing around dodging the Willow's branches when a furious voice behind them yelled for them to get away from the tree.

            The students turned to find Professor Hilda, the Care of Magical Creatures teacher, running toward them.  "Did you not hear the Headmaster's warning when you first arrived?" she shrieked. "That tree could kill you!  Back in the castle, all of you! And you know gambling is illegal at Hogwarts, so whoever that belongs to, I suggest you make it disappear from my sight immediately." she motioned to the large pile of money on the ground.

            James stepped forward and used a banishing spell on the money.  "We'll divide it up later." he whispered to the other two boys who were still in the running, and the group dispersed.

After splitting up the money and finding themselves, except for Peter, a good deal richer than they had been earlier in the day, the Marauders were wandering the school grounds looking for more trouble to get into when Sirius's eyes lit up mischievously.  He elbowed James in the ribs and pointed at a lone figure walking toward the castle.  It was Severus Snape, his uncommonly large nose glued to what appeared to be an advanced book on the dark arts.  He was alone for once instead of shadowing Lucius Malfloy and his gang.

James's dark eyes began to gleam roguishly.  Sirius and James were often mistaken for brothers, but not because of looks; the only physical feature they had in common was their jet black hair (even that wasn't very similar because James's hair stood up wildly in every direction, while Sirius seemed to roll out of bed with his hair perfect).  Their impish grins and the merry twinkle in their eyes showed how much they were alike under the skin, though.

"What do you boys say we go pay Snape back for that comment about Muggle-borns he made in Potions the other day." James asked, a wicked grin appearing on his face.

"Come on you guys, don't sink to his level." Remus said.

"Oh don't worry about us, we're all in Gryffindor, remember?  We could never sink as low as a Slytherin." Sirius assured him.

"Besides, we won't hurt him, we're just gonna have a little fun." James added.

They headed off in the direction Snape had gone and caught up to him just outside the marble doors.  James took out his wand and murmured an incantation.  Green and sliver ribbons swirled out of his wand onto Snape's back, forming into words that read: BOYCOTT THE EVIL CREATION KNOWN AS THE SHOWER!!

The Marauders, even Remus, sniggered uncontrollably, but Snape was so interested in his book that he didn't notice.  As he walked, people from the other three houses stopped to laugh at the sallow-faced and greasy-haired Slytherin.


	9. Remus's Secret

A week later, the Marauders were sitting in Transfiguration again, trying not to laugh at the rage on Professor McGonagall's face as she screamed at Sirius for turning his mouse into a snake (the assignment was to turn it into a rock) and allowing it to slither around the classroom scaring the girls, when someone knocked at the door.  They used the interruption to hide their snickering, until the girl in the doorway asked to see Remus.  He packed up his things and left, telling his friends that he didn't know what it was about, although they noticed that he didn't look them in the eye.

            He didn't rejoin then in their next class, and by the time they returned to Gryffindor Tower after dinner, he was still gone.  

            "I wonder what's up with him." Peter frowned.

            "Dunno, I hope it's nothing serious." James said as they climbed the stairs up to their dorm room.

            "Hey, look at this." Sirius walked over to Remus's bed and picked up a piece of parchment.

Hey guys, my mom's sick again and I'm going home to see her.  I'll be back in a couple of days.  Don't get in too much trouble while I'm gone.  Remus

"Wow, I hope she's ok.  This is the second time he's gone home to see her." Peter worried, but James was looking curiously at Remus's bed.

"He took all his books." James noted.

"So? You know Remus, he wouldn't want to fall behind." Peter shrugged.

"If his mum was that sick, I don't think he'd be worrying about how much homework he missed." Sirius said thoughtfully.

"So what, you guys think he's lying about where he went?" Peter asked sounding thoroughly confused.

Sirius ignored him.  "He's gone a lot, and something didn't seem quite right last time he left either."

"He was sick, people!" Peter said exasperatedly.

"Yeah, so sick that he had to stay overnight in the hospital wing and Madam Pomfrey wouldn't let us visit him." Sirius mused.

"You said yourselves that he looked really pale."

"Yes, and come to think of it, he looked pale again today."

"I do believe our dear friend is hiding something." James remarked.

"I agree." Sirius stated.

"But why?  What's he hiding?" Peter asked.

"Now that is the first intelligent question you've come up with all night." Sirius smiled at him.

Long after Peter and Frank had gone to sleep, James and Sirius lay awake trying to figure out what their friend was up to.  

"So what's making him pale?  Is he really sick?  Maybe its something serious and he just doesn't want to tell us." James whispered.

"Maybe he's a werewolf." Sirius said, staring out the window at the full moon.

James was about to tell him off for messing around, when he suddenly remembered something.  His eyes went wide and he rolled out of bed, searching for something in his book bag.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Sirius propped himself up on one elbow to raise see what James was looking for.  "I was only joking."  

"I just remembered something.  Last time Remus was gone was a full moon, too.  I remember I needed his help on my astronomy chart, because _you_ never pay attention."

"Who cares about where the flippin' stars are?  I don't believe in any of that fortune telling/ stargazing crap."

James just ignored him as he pulled his astronomy chart out of his bag. _"Lumos" _His wand began to glow as he skimmed through the charts. "See, look at this, the first time was full moon, too!  Some coincidence, he's absent three times, and all three just happen to fall on full moons?  And haven't you noticed how he always looks kind of pale before he leaves?  And when he comes back he looks terrible, all exhausted, like he just got over some horrible illness."

"Come on James, you don't really think Remus is a werewolf do you?" Sirius frowned.

"It checks out." James answered as he pulled out another book and began leafing through it.  "Ok, five signs of a werewolf; gone at full moons, obviously; it says they're rather pale and look slightly unhealthy even between  moons, that definitely fits; can't touch silver; abnormally strong; and that they are afraid of the moon."

"Have you ever seen Remus act like he was scared of the moon?" Sirius asked, still skeptic.

"Well no, but how many times have you seen him outside in the moonlight?  Have you ever seen him handle silver?  I noticed when we were in Hogsmeade he just had a bunch of Knuts, but no Sickles."

"So, he's not exactly rich, that doesn't make him a werewolf."

"I know how we can figure this out, once and for all."

"Ask him?"

James rolled his eyes. "If he's been hiding it from us this long, do you think he'd just admit it if we did ask?  No, just try to force him to touch silver."

"But if he is a werewolf, won't that hurt?"

"I'm sure if he knows it will hurt he won't do it."

"Whatever, you're crazy.  I'm going to sleep."

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            The next day during Care of Magical Creatures, where they were looking after flobberworms, Sirius pulled a lollipop out of his bag.

"Here, mate." he said, handing it to Peter, who was widely known to have a bit of a sweet tooth. "I've already had about as much candy as I can take."

"Really? Thanks!" Peter said as he eagerly stuck the lollipop in his mouth.

A few moments later a loud scream filled the classroom and James and Sirius began laughing so hard they almost fell out of their chairs.  The rest of the class turned to look at Peter, who was sticking his tongue out and trying to talk at the same time.  Some of the girls gasped and the rest of the class burst out laughing.  There was a hole in the middle of Peter's tongue that was getting slowly but steadily bigger.

"Acid Pops, Pete." Sirius said between fits of laughter.  "Got 'em at Honeydukes, remember?"

"Mr. Black, I suppose you think this is amusing?" screeched Professor Hilda, the Care of Magical Creatures teacher.

"I'm sorry, ma'am.  It was just a little harmless joke." Sirius said flashing her a winning smile.

"Well then, you can escort Mr. Pettigrew to the hospital wing and explain to Madam Pomfrey what happened." she said, her anger fading slightly and not seeming to realize that getting out of class was a reward for Sirius..

"Yes, ma'am."

As the two boys gathered up their things and walked out of the classroom, Sirius clapped Peter on the back.  "How'd those Acid Pops feel, pal?" he asked, sounding genuinely curious.

"Lyk umtim az banen uh olen I un, asole." Peter said, without any real malice in his voice.

"Sorry, Pete, didn't catch that." Sirius grinned.

When they arrived at the hospital wing, Sirius explained what was wrong with Peter because the smaller boy's tongue was nearly gone and he couldn't talk.  Madam Pomfrey scolded him while she made the antidote for Peter, but Sirius was more interested in the bed in the far end of the hospital wing.  The curtains were drawn around it, which was strange in itself, especially sense none of the other beds were being used.  But even more unusual was the faint scratching sound of a quill on parchment coming from it.  It seemed odd that someone who was too ill to be exposed to other patients to get out of class was well enough to be writing.  Under the edge of the curtain Sirius thought he caught a glimpse of a suitcase that looked just like Remus's. 


	10. Caught

A/N: God I get such nice reviews! *grins like an idiot and accepts crown from Craymere*  Yeah the updates are easy cuz I already have most of the story written cuz I personally HATE waiting for updates. Hehe, patience isn't my strong suit, but I'm just trying to proof read everything before I upload it.  Anyways, thanks again, u guys r great!

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Remus walked into the dormitory the next day and found his three friends lounging on their beds.  James was playing with a silver Sickle, throwing it against the ceiling and catching it deftly as it fell.  Peter was watching James in awe, his mouth hanging slightly open, and Sirius was sprawled on his back with one leg thrown casually over the side of the bed.

"Hey Remus."  How's your mom?" James asked when he caught sight of the light haired boy.  He was still playing with the coin, but his eyes were focused intently on Remus.  Peter turned around to look at him and even Sirius had propped himself up on one elbow for a better view.  There was something in their eyes that Remus didn't like.

"She's ok.  St. Mungo's fixed her up in about a half hour." he replied as innocently as he could.

"Glad to hear it." James said. "Here, catch."

With that he threw his coin at Remus, who was so surprised that he instinctively reached out to catch it- and yelped as the silver burned him.  He looked around wildly at his friends and noticed, to his horror, that while Sirius looked mildly surprised, none of them showed any confusion about his reaction to the silver.  They had figured him out.

In his confusion and panic, Remus followed his first instinct: he tried to bolt.  Sirius was closer to the door, however, and by the time Remus had reached it, the dark haired boy had already rolled out of bed and blocked his escape.  Remus shoved him out of the way with surprising strength and was about to flee down the stairs, when Sirius, who was still slightly dazed and out of breath, grabbed hold of his robes.

"If you go running through there like a maniac…" he panted as he tried to recover his breath.

"everyone will get suspicious." James finished for him.  He had jumped out of bed as soon as Remus tried to run, and was now standing apprehensively between Remus and the doorway.  Peter was standing far enough away to ensure his safety if Remus decided to plow through the other boys again.

Remus was still looking back and forth between his friends like a frightened wild animal, but he was no longer poised to flee, so Sirius released his robes.

"When were you bitten?" Sirius asked softly.

That wasn't exactly the question Remus was expecting.  "When I was five.  My parents tried everything, but there's no cure."

"Why didn't you tell us?" James asked quietly.

"WHY??!!  Why didn't I tell you I'm a monster?  Because I kind of liked having friends.  Because I knew that if anyone found out about me, I'd be kicked out of school.  Because this was my first chance at a normal life in six years, and I blew it.  I knew I shouldn't make friends, shouldn't get too close to anyone, but I had to go and hang out with the two smartest kids in the school, and now my secret's out!" Remus exploded.

"Whoa, calm down mate." Sirius said, looking surprised. "Your secret's safe with us." He grinned. "Come on, you don't really think we'd go running to our parents to get you kicked out do you?"

"Or tell the rest of the school." James added.  "Really, I'm hurt that you have so little faith in us."  He was grinning also.

"What…" Remus trailed off, looking thoroughly confused.

"Aw, come on, you prat, you didn't really think we'd decide you were a monster and not want anything to do with you, did you?" James smiled.

"Well, kind of." Remus admitted in bewilderment, still looking like he believed they were suddenly going to come to their senses and scream at him to get away from them.

"Wow, that hurts." Sirius said, putting a hand over his heart in an overly dramatic way.

"Well, you know, most people don't like to associate with werewolves." Remus said, trying to keep the pain and bitterness from his voice.

"No wonder you're so screwed up socially, you've never had any friends." Sirius said, finally making Remus chuckle.

"Ok I'm confused here, you guys don't even care that I'm a monster?" he asked, starting to sound hopeful.

"James, I do believe that Mr. Moony here is even slower than Pete." Sirius smirked.

"Nah, no one is as slow as Pete." James said fondly, reaching over to muss the smaller boy's hair as Peter started spluttering indignantly. "And besides, Remus, you're not a monster.  Maybe you were a few nights ago, but not now." his voice was full of quiet honesty. 

"Yeah, you're just a kid who's a hell of a lot stronger than he looks." Sirius said, rubbing his shoulders where Remus had thrown him into the wall.

Remus blushed.  "Sorry about that.  Side effects of being a werewolf."

"I didn't know you were that strong, or I would've sicked you on Crabbe and Goyle a long time ago." Sirius grinned.

Remus laughed. "Even right after the full moon, I couldn't take them both at once." 

"Oh I think you could."

They all chuckled, and the last of the tension disappeared.  Remus couldn't believe it; he'd been discovered, but instead of being on his way home in disgrace, he was still here laughing with his friends.  Friends who had stuck by him despite what he was.  This was the first time that he'd felt truly happy in the last six years.

"You should probably get that hand fixed up, Remy." James told him.

Remus looked down and saw that the skin on his fingers was all blistered and peeling.  He had been so happy that his friends weren't going to desert him that he had forgotten all about the pain.

"Yeah, sorry about tricking you like that, mate." Sirius added.

"No worries, Madam Pomfrey could fix this in about a second." Remus headed for the stairs, and his friends followed.


	11. Slytherins and Christmas Cheer

Winter holidays were just around the corner, and all the teachers were trying to cram in as much as they could before the students left for vacation.  The Marauders were up late every night, along with the rest of Gryffindor Tower, trying to finish all their homework.  Only Sirius seemed unconcerned with his huge workload.  As the other three poured over Transfiguration notes and Astronomy charts, he paged through a huge book of spells that he had checked out from the library a few weeks earlier.

            "You know, Sirius, your homework isn't just going to do itself." Peter informed him as Sirius pulled out some of the food he and James had stolen from the kitchens and continued looking through his library book.

            "Wouldn't that be nice?  You know what, Pete?  I'm going to invent a quill that does homework all by itself and I'll dedicate it to you." Sirius said absently.

            "Could you actually do that?" Peter asked, sounding excited at the prospect.

            Remus raised an eyebrow.  "Don't you think if it could be done someone would've done it already?" 

            "Well why couldn't you bewitch a quill to be able to do your homework."

            "You could, but you'd have to also give it the ability to think on its own, take in information so that it would know what to write, and move by itself.  Hell, you'd basically have to make it come alive and be just about as intelligent as you are." James answered without looking up from his Potions essay.  

            "But Peter's right, Sirius, McGonagall and Smeral would love to give you detentions for not doing your work."

            "McGonagall's just pissed because I can do everything.  She doesn't like having the class clowns actually be smart, too."

            "True, but still, she and Smeral could make your life one big long detention."

            "Funny, that's how it's been feeling all year long, anyway.  I've got the school record for the most detentions in a year, and it's not even Christmas.  Besides, I only have two weeks to do something to Bellatrix that she won't forget."

            "Just before you go home to see your family?  I thought you were intelligent." Remus snorted.

            "My dear Moony, I am not going home over the holidays." Sirius smiled, "I'm sure I'll hear all about how I'm an embarrassment to my family, but it would be so worth it, to send her home with red and gold hair or something."

            Ever since they had found out that Remus was a werewolf, Sirius and James had been calling him Moony.  At first Remus had been afraid that someone might figure out what it meant, but everyone accepted that it was just another inside joke, the Marauders had hundreds anyway.

            "Hey, me neither." James said happily.  "My parents are going to France, so I'm stuck here.  Think of all the fun we could have!"

            "You know, Sirius, I think I heard something about a Permanent Dye Spell that you could use on Bella's hair." Remus told him. 

            "Permanent Dye, hmmm?  That would be perfect!" his friends had never seen him so excited as he flipped his book to the index, looking for the Permanent Dye Spell.

            "Of course it would only be permanent until her hair grew out, or she dyed it black, though."

            "That doesn't matter.  In fact, that's even better.  All the Blacks are obsessive about their hair.  It's a family trait, and they would never even dream of dying it.  The women in my family would never even cut their hair; just trim it enough to keep it looking perfect.  If she had to dye it…  Moony, you're brilliant!"

            They just laughed at him as he read through the spell much more carefully than he had ever been with any spell given to him by a professor.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            The last Quidditch match before the holidays was Gryffindor versus Ravenclaw.  The weather was much better than the last game; cool and overcast, but dry.  All the Gryffindors watched in frustration as their team was steamrollered by the blue and silver Ravenclaws.  Hardly two minutes into the game, their Keeper, Wayne Johnson, let in a goal and his game fell apart from there.  The Ravenclaw Chasers, two tall boys and Andromeda Black who obviously shared her cousin's talent on a broom, had no trouble outmaneuvering the Gryffindor Beaters.  

            Sirius jumped to his feet screaming at one of the Beaters, a Thomas Forest, as he sent a Bludger spinning toward one of the Ravenclaw Chasers.  The boy ducked, and the Bludger slammed into the Gryffindor Keeper, hitting him in the head.  Ravenclaw scored as the Gryffindor Keeper fell from his broom, unconscious.  

            The spectators gasped and a few girls screamed, but Nicolas Tanner, a Chaser and one of the few good fliers on the Gryffindor team, caught him before he hit the ground.  By the time Tanner landed, Johnson was coming 'round. 

            They called a time out, but he insisted that he was alright, so the game continued.  Ravenclaw scored five more times in the next twenty minutes, putting the score at 90 to 30.  Gryffindor began hoping for a miracle when their Seeker went into a sudden dive, but the Snitch seemed to have disappeared before he reached it, and he pulled up empty handed.  

            Fifteen minutes later, the Ravenclaw Seeker dived suddenly, but this time it wasn't a false alarm.  Madam Hooch's whistle blew as the Seeker held up the struggling Snitch.

            "I can't believe it!" James raged as they walked back to the castle in low spirits.  "I saw the Snitch before that idiot on the broom!"

            "And what about that Bludger?  That has to be the worst aim I have _ever_ seen!  I could have done better with my eyes closed!" Sirius fumed.

            "Well, we'll be on the team next year.  Just wait, everything will be different." James said, his dark mood lightening as he pictured himself and Sirius on the house team.

            "Oh no, I'm so nervous." a cold voice drawled behind them.  They whirled around to find half of Slytherin house following them.  "Did you hear that, Bella?  Sirius Black and Potty Potty Potter are gonna play Quidditch next year."

            "What ever will Slytherin do?" Bellatrix said in a mockingly worried tone.  "We'll never be able to win against _them." her fake worry dissolved into derision as she began to laugh._

            "I hope my team's up to the challenge." A tall boy said sarcastically.  Sirius recognized him as Rodolphus Lestrange, the Slytherin Quidditch Captain, he was a big sixth year with dark good looks and evil black eyes.

            "Save your big words until next year, when I can make you eat them, Lestrange." Sirius growled.

            "Ooo, the little first year has a big mouth." he mocked

            Sirius longed at him, but Remus caught him by the back of his robes as Professor McGonagall approached, looking angry.  Her team had just lost any chance of winning the Cup for the sixth year in a row, and she seemed to be looking for something to vent her anger on.  The Slytherins noticed this too.

            "We'll continue this on the pitch next year, Black." Lestrange hissed as he and the rest of the Slytherins walked away.

            "Can't wait." Sirius growled quietly.

            Any chance the Marauders had of lifting their spirits that day was gone.  They climbed the stairs to Gryffindor Tower in foul moods over the game and more importantly what had occurred after.  James's face was set in a scowl, Remus looked disgusted with the tactics of the Slytherins, and Peter seemed, more than anything else, scared of his friends' bad moods.  Sirius's face, on the other hand, was etched with determination to beat Lestrange in the only place he could, on the Quidditch pitch.


	12. Alone in the Castle

            Somehow they all got through the next two weeks without any huge incidents.  James got a detention for dropping a Dungbomb in History of Magic, and even Sirius miraculously only missed one assignment; a summary for Herbology, but since the Herbology teacher had a bit of a soft spot for Sirius, she allowed him to just stand up and summarize the chapter for the class.  He recited, almost word for word, a mixture of James and Remus's papers, but she never noticed.

            A few days before they left for the holidays, Sirius decided it was time to start putting his plan in action against Bellatrix.  Every since the prank he had pulled on the Hogwarts Express, they had been going back and forth, although he hated his cousin as much as she did him, Sirius's tricks were always funny while Bella's were down right malicious.  Now, however, he was ready to get her back for every mean thing she had ever said or done to him or his friends.

            The only problem was that, in order to perform the spell, he needed a lock of her hair.  Bellatrix would never let any of the Marauders get close enough behind her to  cut a lock of her hair off, and Sirius was reluctant to include his friends in this prank; it was between him and Bellatrix.  He was sitting in one of the armchairs by the fire late one night when he noticed one of the house elves cleaning.  

            "Hey, Jilly." he called.

            The elf turned around, surprised.  "What does sir want?"

            "I was wondering if you could do a huge favor for me." Sirius asked.  "I'll give you whatever you want."

            Her eyes narrowed. "Jilly not want clothes." she said angrily.

            "Not clothes, then.  Anything else that you do want?" he asked hurriedly.

            "Well, sir… Jilly always wanted some chocolates." she said.

            Sirius almost laughed out loud.  This was too easy.  "Ok, I'll get you as much chocolate as you want, if you'll go into the Slytherin Dungeon, to the fifth year girls' dorm and cut off a lock of a girl's hair and bring it to me."

            "What does sir want girl's hair for?" she asked suspiciously. 

            "Nothing important.  But it must be a certain girl.  She has black hair like mine, about down to her waist.  Do you think you could do that for me?" 

            "Jilly can do it.  Jilly knows the girl.  Girl is not nice to Jilly." the elf said darkly.

            "No, I wouldn't think she would be." Sirius agreed.

            The next night the elf appeared with a lock of Bella's hair in her fist.  "Jilly got girl's hair.  You will give Jilly chocolates?"  Sirius handed her a chocolate frog and hurried off to his dorm to perform the spell.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            The last day before Christmas vacation started, the students crowded into the Great Hall for breakfast amid beautiful decorations.  There were fourteen real Christmas Trees, rows upon rows of holly, mistletoe hanging everywhere, and stockings in front of the fireplace.  

As the Marauders entered the hall, Sirius noticed Bellatrix sitting at the Slytherin table with a particularly nasty expression on her face.  She turned toward Sirius as he walked in and if looks could kill, he would have been dead in an instant.  She was wearing a tall, black witch's hat, which few of the students ever wore, and her hair was done up so that the hat covered it.

Sirius had been in a good mood all morning, looking forward to spending the holidays away from his parents and with James, but his spirits soared at the look on Bella's face.  As the four took their seats at the Gryffindor table, he nudged his friends. 

"Watch this."

The pointed his wand toward Bellatrix, hiding it from view from the High Table with his body, and mumbled a few words.  There was a gust like a strong wind, and Bellatrix's hat was blown off.  Her waist length hair tumbled down and they saw that it was had indeed been dyed Gryffindor colors; the red and gold precisely matched the shades on the lion banner that flew above the Gryffindor table.

Over at the Slytherin table, Narcissa shrieked as she caught sight of her sister's hair.  Bella looked so furious that Sirius wondered if the teachers would be able to stop her quickly enough if she decided to take her anger out on the people around her with some horrible curse.  He laughed along with most of the Gryffindor table and many people from other houses that Bella had made enemies of at one time or another.

"Oy, Bella, did you forget which house you're in?  You're with the Death Eaters, remember?!" Sirius called in a highly amused voice.

He was sure he would be cursed right there in the Great Hall and he decided it would be worth it just to see her face, but to his amazement, Bella was able to contain her anger.  Breakfast ended, classes drew to a close with teachers assigning mountains of homework over the break, the boats pulled away carrying Remus, Peter and the other students who would be returning home for the holidays, and the castle emptied out except for the few students who would be staying.  The holidays had arrived and James and Sirius couldn't wait for the fun to begin.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            The other students had hardly been gone an hour when James and Sirius snuck out of Gryffindor Tower under the Invisibility Cloak.  They were carrying the remainder of their Zonko's supply and looking for the Slytherin Dungeon.  Severus Snape was also staying at school over the holidays, and they felt it was so great an opportunity to play tricks on him that they couldn't miss it.  As Peter and Remus left, Snape had made a snide remark about Peter's Muggle family, and although Remus had already punched him in the face, they believed that Snape deserved to pay even more.

            They nearly got lost more times than either of them cared to count, but eventually they found the portrait that covered the entrance to the Slytherin dormitories.  It was a picture of an evil looking man with a dagger in his hand and blood on his clothes.  Now all they had to do was wait for a Slytherin to come by who knew the password.

            After a while, a stocky blond girl named Parkinson appeared.  Parkinson had an older brother who was one the many Slytherin boys who ran around doing whatever Bellatrix wanted of them.  Sirius's lip curled in a sneer as the girl walked past them, and said the password 'Down with the Mudbloods.' 

            Sirius's whole body went rigid with fury, and he began to shake slightly with the effort of containing his rage.  "Racist gits.  Fucking pureblooded pigs." he exploded as soon as the portrait closed.  He was able to keep his voice to a whisper, but the red-hot anger in his voice would've been enough to scare anyone who heard him.  James's face was white with anger also, but he placed a restraining hand on his friend's shoulder. 

            The portrait swung open to reveal a dank and uninviting common room with a waning fire and greenish lamps.  Luckily it was deserted, so they gave the girl ten minutes after the portrait swung closed again, hoping she would go straight to the girls' dormitories.  When they felt they had waited long enough, James slipped out from underneath the Invisibility Cloak to give the password and they climbed through the portrait-hole.

            Parkinson was gone, which enabled them to move freely around the room without worrying that anyone would see the things they left behind and guess what they were up to.  James took out a jar of Itching Powder, and started sprinkling it on everything in the room.

            Sirius followed him around pouring a potion that would cause nasty boils on anyone it touched onto the armchairs and letting rats, spiders, and scorpions out of a small cage he had been carrying.  Before they left, they rigged the door to the boy's dormitory with a bucket of toilet water from a clogged toilet on the third floor bewitched to dump on the first person to walk through the door.

            Snickering quietly to themselves, they headed back to Gryffindor Tower eagerly awaiting breakfast the next morning.  They weren't disappointed.  Because so few of the students were staying, Professor Dumbledore had decided they should all eat together at one table, and Snape showed up with an ugly bruise his unusually large nose from Remus's fist (Madam Pomfrey had healed the broken bones), a rash all over his arms and stinking abominably.  

            The two Marauders had to keep themselves from crowing with laughter when Professor McGonagall wrinkled her nose saying, "What is that dreadful smell?"

            Snape glared daggers at the Gryffindor boys, as he scratched furiously at his rash.  James caught the eye of the enormous gamekeeper, Hagrid who seemed to understand what had happened and was grinning from ear to ear.

            Snape left the hall before James and Sirius and was waiting for them right outside the doors with his wand out.  James was quicker; he had his wand out and shouted _"Expelliarmus"_ before Snape could open his mouth.

            Sirius half expected one of the Professors to swoop down on them, but the heavy doors seemed to muffle the sound of James's voice.  Perfect.

            Sirius sniffed the air. "Good God, _Snivellus" Sirius sneered. "You really should take a shower, you smell worse than a pile of dog shit."_

            "Go fuck yourself, Black." Snape snarled.

            "Language, Snivelly.  Didn't your mother ever teach you any manners?  Maybe we should wash your mouth out. _Scourgify!_"

            Snapes mouth filled with pink soap bubbles and he began spluttering and gagging.  "Mudblood lover." he managed to growl around the soap.

            Sirius's eyes darkened and he grabbed  Snape's throat.  

            "I've heard hot sauce works when soap doesn't." James said, his voice full of quiet fury.

            Snape cried out in pain as the soap in his mouth turned into hot sauce, James had made it not only spicy, but hot to the touch as well.

            "What's the matter, Snivelly, can't take the heat?" Sirius mocked

            Snape was about to snarl something in return, but Professor MCGonagall's furious voice, "Put him down right now!"  Sirius allowed Snape to fall in a heap on the floor.  "Black!  Potter!  I am ashamed that any Gryffindor students would behave like this!  Fifty points from Gryffindor; there is nothing brave about two against one."

            Snape was positively gloating. "And you, Mr. Snape!" he wilted as McGonagall turned her angry gaze on him, "I am sure you gave them a reason for this attack.  Twenty points from Slytherin, and detentions for all of you as soon as the holidays are over.  Now shake hands like mature wizards." when they made no move to shake, her glare became positively venomous. "SHAKE!!!" they did so grudgingly, releasing each other's hand so quickly that it could hardly be considered a handshake.


	13. Merry Christmas

A/N: sorry this one's so short.

*          *          *

James and Sirius spent their vacation exploring the castle looking for more secret passages, and sneaking out to Hogsmeade at every opportunity.  They bought so many things from Zonko's and Honeydukes that they were running out of room under their beds to store it, and they hadn't even gotten anything they could eat themselves.  It was all Acid Pops and Cockroach Clusters and other joke sweets.  

            They still needed to get Christmas gifts for Remus and Peter and they hardly had any money left.  They snuck out to Hogsmeade under the Invisibility Cloak looking for gifts a few days before Christmas to find that all the usual presents were picked over.  After wandering around the town for a few hours, they decided on a Quidditch Through the Ages book for Peter along with huge amounts of candy and a few Cockroach Clusters thrown in for good measure.  For Remus they found a model of the moon from an astronomy shop, a book titled Potions for Dummies, and a bunch of Zonko's products.

            It took them much longer than usual to get back to the school because they were weighed down by their gifts, but they were in high spirits looking forward to Christmas.

            Two days later James woke to find the foot of his bed filled with presents.  His owl Hooters was sleeping with his head under his wing perched on top of the pile of gifts, but he woke up with a disgruntled hoot when James jumped out of bed.  A sleepy murmur came from Sirius's direction, and a wicked glint appeared in James's eyes.  He tiptoed over to his friend's bed, pulled back the curtains, and tackled Sirius who let out a surprised sound as his breath was knocked out of him.  The two rolled off the bed still wrestling, eventually Sirius managed to pin James with his superior weight, and suddenly noticed the gifts on his own bed.  

            "Hey look!" he shouted.

            James laughed. "Merry Christmas, you git."

            Sirius stuck his tongue out as he began ripping into his presents.  James returned to his bed and did the same; the first gift he grabbed was from his parents.  It was a huge box of chocolates and a Pocket Sneakscope that was supposed to go off whenever there was someone untrustworthy around.  The note attached to it read:

James, 

Hope you're having a wonderful year.  The Sneakscope might have been a better gift for one of your friends, as it will probably be going off constantly around you.  Enjoy the chocolates and have a Merry Christmas.    Love always, Mom and Dad

            The next box was from Remus; an automatic quill and some joke shop products that James had never seen before.  There were mints that caused your tongue to catch fire, soap made you itch, a powder that, when sprinkled over food, caused the consumer to burst into song uncontrollably, lollipops that turned who ever ate them the same color as the candy, and many other things.

Merry Christmas, James.  Hope you two are enjoying yourselves and not getting into too much trouble (yeah right).  I thought you might like the quill; it can take notes for you while you mess around in class.  I was going to get one for Sirius too, but he doesn't study so I figured it would be useless. There's this really cool joke shop a few blocks from our house and I thought you'd like some variety.  See you soon.  Remus

            Peter had given him more candy and Zonko's products, and Sirius's present was a huge box full of everything he could ever need to cause mischief and mayhem.  James caught his best friend in a bear hug before jumping on his friend's bed and looking through Sirius's presents.  He had gotten a book of hexes from Remus (for the next time Bella gets on your nerves.) and more of the unusual pranks, an expensive looking coat from one of his uncles, and more Zonko's products from everyone else.  His cousin Andromeda had even sent him a Christmas pie that was leftover from their family dinner and a map of Hogwarts with a bunch of hidden passages on it.  It was missing the passages out of the school that the Marauders had already found, though.

            The two boys made their way down to the Great Hall for breakfast, their pockets bulging with Dungbombs and Fire Mints and stomachs already full of candy.  The staff and students all sat at the same table, with Dumbledore at the head wearing a huge yellow bonnet and passing out crackers to everybody.  James and Sirius took theirs eagerly and pointed them at each other as they pulled the strings.  They both got mouthfuls of confetti as the poppers exploded and silly hats were thrown out of them.  Sirius got an enormous flowery pink hat that sat at an angle on his head, while James's was a red and white striped top hat with a Gryffindor lion head on top.

            "What strong Christmas spirit we have here today!" he said, indicating the two boys in their wacky hats.  They had a wonderful Christmas breakfast of ham, bacon, and eggs, and spent the rest of the day being chased around by Filch for pulling pranks and lighting off their new Dungbombs.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            The two Marauders woke up early the morning that the other students were due to return to Hogwarts to leave little surprises for their fellow Gryffindors.  They charmed packages of Filibuster's Fireworks to explode whenever they felt weight on them and hid them in the plush armchairs, they sprinkled itching powder in Remus and Peter's beds, and bewitched whipped cream cans and toilet paper rolls that Peter had sent them for Christmas to come alive and toilet paper the girls' dormitories without human help, since boys couldn't get into the girls' dorm.

            They went down to meet their friends as the boats arrived.  Remus and Peter were sharing their boat with Lily Evans and a cute blond named Lindy Moline.  They seemed highly uncomfortable, but when they had landed and joined James and Sirius, the two black-haired boys noticed that Remus watched Lindy walk off until she turned and glanced back at him.  He immediately turned back to his friends, his cheeks turning pink, and asked in a forced cheerful voice about their holiday. 

            "I think Remy has a crush on Lindy Moline." Sirius teased.

            Remus turned a brilliant shade of red.  "W-what are you talking about?" he spluttered.

            Sirius turned to James for support, but found him staring at a certain redhead.  Sirius sighed exasperatedly.  "Not you, too!" he said, smacking James lightly to get his attention.

            James flushed a shade scarlet to rival the one Remus had donned earlier.  "What?  I don't know what you're talking about." he said hurriedly.  Sirius just rolled his eyes.

            By the time they made their way back to Gryffindor Tower, most of the other Gryffindors were already there and judging by the shouts audible from the hall, not happy.  The four boys climbed through the portrait hole and all eyes immediately turned toward them.

            "It was you!" a furious fourth year girl screeched.  Her hair was frizzy as though it had just been burnt and her robes were slightly scorched.  James and Sirius immediately fell on the floor laughing, and even Peter and Remus who had no clue what had happened couldn't stop themselves from bursting into laughter at the girl's angry face.

            "What did you do?" Remus managed to get as he calmed down slightly, but James and Sirius were still rolling on the floor with amusement and didn't bother to answer.

            "They put fireworks in the chairs." Krissy Miller said, her face was serious, but amusement was glittering in her eyes.  Her friends were standing around her, and Remus noticed with an odd sense of relief that although Lily Evans looked irritated, the other girls, Lindy included, were smiling.

            "I swear I'll never understand how the professors thought it was a good idea to leave you two alone and unsupervised in Gryffindor Tower for the holidays." Remus informed his friends, shaking his head in mock exasperation.

            James and Sirius had started to calm down and where now sitting up instead of rolling around on their sides.  At the mention of the holidays their eyes lit up.  "Oh we didn't spend much time in Gryffindor Tower." James said, his eyes gleaming impishly.

            "You gotta hear what we did to the Slytherins!" Sirius added as he jumped to his feet and pulled Remus toward the stairs to their room.  "See you guys later!" he called to the other Gryffindors who were looking either highly amused or irritated as Peter and James followed him.  

Moments later they heard a furious shriek from the girls' dormitories and then the sound of someone stomping up the stairs toward their room.  The dorm flew open to reveal Lily Evans, her face nearly as red as her hair.  She marched up to James and slapped him on the cheek.  All four Marauders watched in shocked apprehension as she leveled a finger at him and growled warningly.

"I don't know what you're life before Hogwarts was like to convince you that everyone else is your plaything, but let me assure you I will not lay down and let you use me for your own amusement just because you're _cute_ or because of that flyboy attitude of yours.  Next time you lay a hand, or a wand, on me, my things, or my room, I will go straight to McGonagall.  You got that?"

James just stared as Lily turned on her heel and stomped out without waiting for a reply.  As soon as she was out of earshot Sirius began to chuckle.

"Feisty, isn't she?"

"She's completely insane." James whined. 


	14. The Gryffindors and Professor Binns

            The next morning Remus woke up early, itching everywhere.  He knew immediately what it was from, and he was about to growl angrily at the sleeping boys in the beds next to him when a better idea struck him.  He rummaged around looking for his wand and scratching furiously at every part of his body he could reach.  When he finally found his wand he had to concentrate hard to remember the spell that got rid of rashes.  Finally he got the itching to stop, although his body was still red, and he vanished the rest of the itching powder from his bed.

            He went back to sleep, waiting for the opportunity to wreak his revenge on his best friends.  He was awakened a few hours later by Peter wailing at Sirius and making a fool of himself by trying to scratch everywhere at once.  Remus opened his eyes just in time to see Peter launch himself at the taller boy who sidestepped him easily.  He pretended to be asleep until James and Sirius, still laughing, walked off toward the showers.

            As soon as they were out of sight he swung out of bed.  "Here, Pete." he whispered as he used the same spell on the smaller boy that he had used on himself earlier.

            "Thanks, Remy." Peter sighed with relief as Remus walked over to James and Sirius's beds.  He grinned evilly as he vanished all of their clothes, leaving nothing but empty drawers.  He hid all his own clothes so that the other boys couldn't steal them and walked just far enough into the bathroom so that he could see the two piles of pajamas outside the shower stalls.  It was too easy.  He vanished those also, and the towels for good measure, before getting dressed and sauntering out of the dorm.

            Five minutes later Remus and Peter were sitting armchairs in the common room, after checking them carefully for fireworks, itching powder and anything else they could think of, when they heard James's voice bellow "Remus Lupin, you prat, get your ass in here!"

            "Why don't you come out here, James?" Remus called innocently.

            James just made a frustrated sound.  By then everyone in the room was staring at Remus and Peter who suddenly looked up to find Sirius standing in the doorway soaking wet and wrapped in a sheet.  It was a Sunday, so most of Gryffindor house was in the common room.  Most of the younger girls blushed at the sight of Sirius Black with his hair wet and wearing nothing but a bed sheet.  "Ok, one chance to give me my clothes before I have to get ugly." Sirius threatened, but his voice was light and he looked amused.

            "Oh don't worry, Sir, you're already there." Remus taunted.

            Sirius put on a highly offended expression, and threw one hand over his heart dramatically.  "Now you've gone too far, Lupin."

            "What you gonna do about it, Black?" Glittering amber eyes met baby blue, twinkles of amusement mirrored in both, and Sirius sprung from the doorway.  Remus jumped up so fast that he knocked over his chair, jumped over an empty one, and ran to the other side of the room laughing.

            "Be careful your sheet doesn't catch on something, Siri.  I'm sure McGonagall gives detentions for indecent exposure."

            The girls blushed and giggled at that, but Sirius just shrugged.

            "What McGonagall doesn't know won't hurt her." he said flippantly.  "Besides I've already got detention for fighting with Snivellus."

            Remus cackled at that as he continued to run from Sirius whose agility was severely impeded by the long sheet tied around his waist.  "Good one, who came up with it, you or James?"

            "That one was all mine.  Doesn't it fit him well though?"

            "Perfectly.  Where is James anyway?" he jumped over a first year girl, causing her to squeal.

            "Sulking in bed, too modest to let the girls see him without his clothes on." Sirius snickered.

            They continued their game of cat and mouse until Remus made a wrong move and cornered himself between a wall and the fireplace.  Sirius pounced on him and tickled him mercilessly.  Remus squirmed on the ground trying to get away, but Sirius used his superior weight to keep him pinned.

            "Peter, help me!" Remus called out to the smallest Marauder.

            "Sorry mate, but Sirius is a little bigger than me." Peter grinned, obviously not sorry at all.  That was a bit of an understatement; Sirius towered over Peter by about eight inches, but at the moment Remus didn't care.

            "I helped you out with the itching powder!" Remus gasped between fits of laughter as Sirius continued to tickle him.

            "And I really do appreciate it." Peter said, his grin widening.

            "Traitor!  I'll get you, Peter!" Peter laughed outright at that, but he didn't find it half so amusing that night at dinner when Remus slipped Singing Solution into his drink and Peter found himself unable to stop singing at the top of his lungs.

            After awhile Sirius gave up trying to get Remus to return his clothes, and threw himself down in one of the chairs still wrapped in his sheet.  James, however, was not as accepting; after a few minutes he called down to Sirius to see if he had gotten their clothes back yet.  When Sirius said no he began yelling at them as loud as he could.  A wicked grin spread over Remus's face.

            "Ok, James, I give up, come get your robes." he called as the robes materialized in his hand.

            "Bring them up to me, you stupid git!" James bellowed back.

            "For that comment, I think I'll make you come get them." Remus yelled.  He threw one pair of robes to Sirius, who put them on and pulled the sheet out from underneath them.  

            "How 'bout some boxers, Remy?" The girls turned bright red again as Remus flicked his wand casually and a pair of blue and green boxers appeared in Sirius's hand.  He pulled them on as though it was no big deal to be getting dressed in a crowded room as James's head appeared in the doorway.

            Remus held up the robes.  "Come on, don't tell me you're afraid of what the girls might think." he teased.

            James flushed, but he squared his shoulders and marched out into the common room wearing a sheet just like Sirius had been.  He reached for his robes, but Remus pulled them away.

            "Even?" he asked

            James glared at his friend, but agreed.  Remus handed him the robes which he pulled over his head.  "The rest of your clothes are back in your dressers." Remus told them as he muttered a few choice words and flicked his wand.  James turned around and dashed back to his room.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            Remus was bored.  In fact, he couldn't remember ever being this bored in his entire life.  It was the first bright, sunny day they'd had in ages and here he was cooped up in History of Magic, the most boring subject at school.  He glanced around him and found, not to his surprise, that no one was paying the slightest attention to the droning voice of their professor.

            In the seat next to him, James was using his automatic quill to take notes and was absently doodling with Sirius's quill on a spare piece of paper.  On the other side of James, Sirius was balancing his chair on its back legs, staring blankly out the window.  On Remus's other side, Peter was trying to practice the Color Changing spell they had to perform in Charms next.  He kept muttering the incantation and tapping his quill, which was still as white as ever, but starting to smoke slightly.

            Behind Sirius, Krissy and a black haired girl named Jenna were watching him stare out the window and giggling as they whispered in each other's ears.  No doubt they were talking about how hot Sirius looked when he was bored out of his mind.  Remus was sure he would never understand how girls' minds worked.  In the back corner, Lily Evans and Lindy were talking seriously about something, and the ghost of Professor Binns droned inexorably on in his monotonous voice.

            _What everyone needs, _thought Remus, _is some excitement._  He looked around for a potential target, his eyes coming to rest on the girl in front of him.  Her name was Alice, and she was a nice girl with a healthy sense of humor.  She wouldn't mind being the victim of an innocent joke to save her class from being bored to tears.

            He pulled out his wand, and muttered a spell under his breath.  Alice's long auburn hair immediately began to change; starting at the roots and moving toward the tips, it began to turn green, locks of hair turned into one thick piece and it stiffened until it was standing up on her head.  After a moment it was obvious that her hair was turning into flower stems, and the stems began to sprout blossoms.  

            Soon her head was covered by all sorts of flowers; there were bluebonnets, snap dragons, poppies, daffodils, and even a Venus Fly Trap.  The class had just started to come out of its stupor to notice the change.  People began murmuring, and some started giggling.  James looked up and snorted with laughter, drawing the attention of Sirius who nearly fell over backwards in surprise and Peter whose quill had finally turned grey, though that was probably because it was burnt.  

Alice noticed the funny stares of her classmates, and frowned in confusion.  She put a hand to her head and felt what had once been her hair.  She looked surprised for a moment before she started laughing.  She raised her hand, but Professor Binns didn't look up; he hadn't noticed anything, which wasn't that surprising considering the fact that he had never even noticed his own death.

"Um, Professor Binns, sir?  Could I go to see Madam Pomfrey?  I have flowers growing out of my head."

The entire class broke out laughing, even Lily Evans who hated the Marauders, and Professor Binns looked up.  He'd clearly been wrong footed by the interruption and didn't know what to do.  "Madam Pomfrey, yes I suppose so." He muttered, sounding confused.

Alice packed up, as she headed out the door, she glanced over at the Marauders trying to figure out who it had been.  They were all wearing identical grins, and she couldn't decide who looked guilty.  As the door closed behind her, James clapped Remus on the back.

"That was bloody brilliant!  How'd you do it?" he asked.

Remus laughed.  "I just mixed a little of what we learned in Herbology and a switching spell and turned her hair into flowers."

Professor Binns looked like he was about to resume his lecture, so Sirius pulled out this wand and mumbled something under his breath.  The books on the shelf behind Professor Binns started throwing themselves of the shelf and flying around the room.

Professor Bins looked even more confused, but tried to ignore the flying books and continue teaching.  Eager to stop the monotonous professor from getting back into his swing, James took Sirius's lead and made the maps on the wall tear themselves down and join the flying books.

Some of the other Gryffindors joined in and by the time the class ended, anything that was light enough was zipping around the History of Magic classroom and Professor Binns hadn't been able to regain his train of thought.

As they piled out of the classroom, the students were jabbering about the best History of Magic class they had ever had. 

"I think that's the best thing that's happened to old Binns in a century!" Sirius crowed.


	15. Forbidden Forest

Remus Lupin glided sedately on his broomstick, talking to a couple of Ravenclaw boys while watching his three best friends on their brooms.  As always they were quite entertaining in their different ways.  James and Sirius were showing off, as usual; dive bombing each other and zooming through groups of student who, like Remus, weren't quite as comfortable on their brooms.  Sirius and James had had their own brooms since they were very young, and all the extra years of practice had paid off.

Peter, on the other hand, was being helped up by Madam Hooch after falling off his broom again from about five feet in the air (he was afraid to go higher).  Peter was the clumsiest person Remus had ever met, and seemed even more so when compared to his three best friends.  But then, Remus knew how strange most people found it that Peter hung out with the other three Marauders.  Peter was short and slightly chubby with thin mousey brown hair and watery eyes so dark they seemed black.  He was on the slow side, and let himself be pushed around by just about anyone.  Remus and Sirius were among the tallest first years at the school, and James was well above average height.  While James was the only one of the four that could really be called skinny, Remus and Sirius had the gangly look of kids who had grown a lot in a short amount of time.

James, Sirius and Remus had the top grades in their year, while Peter struggled to get by on most of his classes, and although Remus didn't consider himself athletic the way James and Sirius were, he had good reflexes and the superhuman strength and speed that came from being a werewolf.  Peter, on the other hand, was more likely to allow something to bounce off his nose than catch it.

Despite all these differences Peter was one of the Marauders because, shy as he was around strangers, he could be pretty witty sometimes, he didn't take offense when he was the target of a prank, and he wouldn't turn in his friends if he got caught for something and they didn't.

Remus was broken out of his reverie by a gust of wind close to the back of his head and Sirius's voice in his ear.

"Hey, Moony!"

Remus was so startled that he almost fell off his broom, which sent Sirius into a fit of laughter as he sped away, spinning circles and showing off.

"Sirius!  You git!" Remus yelled as he took off after his friend.  Sirius laughed like a maniac as he zoomed around the Quidditch pitch, dodging Remus.  He circled around the group of Gryffindor girls, winking at Krissy, before heading towards the ground.  Remus followed the black-haired boy to the ground, stumbling as he hopped off his broom without waiting for it to come to a full stop, but he quickly regained his balance and took off after Sirius who was still cackling like a lunatic.  With his werewolf speed, he easily caught up to his friend and tackled Sirius from the back.  They fell to the ground in a blur of arms, legs, and robes and play fighting.

They could hear the other students laughing as they pretended to punch each other, and cried out in imaginary pain at blows that didn't really connect.  James was alternately cheering for one or the other, who ever was on top at the moment.

They were pulled apart by Madam Hooch who looked furious.

"What do you think you're doing fighting during my class?" she yelled.

"We were just messing around, Professor." Sirius said innocently.

"Yeah, it was all in good fun, really." Remus confirmed.  "Just a joke."

Madam Hooch's face softened slightly.  "Well, just don't do it again."

"Yes, ma'am." they chorused, smirking at each other about avoiding yet another detention.

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            That night James and Sirius's good mood had disappeared by the time they reported to Filch for their detentions.  They were given buckets of soapy water and told to clean out all of the animal cages in the Care of Magical Creatures and Defense Against the Dark Arts classrooms.  Grumbling loudly about slimy Slytherins and shrewish professors, they set to work. They had barely started on the first cage when the classroom door opened seemingly of its own accord and seconds later, closed itself.  The two boys stared at the door, puzzled, when the air in front of them rippled and Remus and Peter appeared from underneath James's Invisibility Cloak.

"What are you guys doing here?" Sirius asked with a raised eyebrow. "Want to join us in detention?"

Remus snorted. "Hardly.  We just saw a bunch of Slytherins with very bad rashes, Bellatrix included, and we felt that since you had spent your holidays in such a productive way, you deserved some help getting out of detention."

"But if you'd rather clean shit out of a grindylow's cage, we can always leave." Peter teased.

James grinned, "Tempting as the second choice is, I think we'll go.  What do you say, Sir?"

"Well, I was kind of looking forward to cleaning all night, but I guess I'll come with you." Sirius answered in a mock regretful voice.

The four boys slipped under the cloak and out the door.  They were nearly out of earshot when they hear Filch's scream of fury as he discovered that they were gone.  Muffling their laughter against their hands, they ran.

"Where to?" James asked as soon as they had put some distance between themselves and the angry caretaker.

"Let's go exploring." Sirius said, his eyes gleaming in a way that told his friends that whatever plan he had come up with had the potential to get them either in the hospital wing for weeks or expelled.

"Where?" Remus asked warily.

"The Forbidden Forest."

"There're werewolves in the Forbidden Forest!" Peter squeaked.  The taller boys just rolled their eyes at him.

"And you have your very own werewolf to protect you." Sirius reminded him, throwing an arm around Remus's shoulder as the tawny haired boy shook his head exasperatedly.

"Anyway, it's nowhere near full moon." James added.

"Right-o, Jim, my boy." Sirius flung his other arm around James.

"You know I hate that name." James said flatly.

"Of course he does." Remus chuckled.

Sirius just grinned and the Marauders headed off in toward the Forbidden Forest.  They left James's Invisibility Cloak hidden at the edge of the trees; it was dark in the forest anyway and they didn't want the cloak to hamper them if they had to make a quick getaway.  They hadn't gotten very far, when Peter started asking if they could go back, but the other three were caught up in the thrill of knowing that they were doing something extremely dangerous.

"Hey, look at this." James said, pointing at the ground.  Barely visible in the soft dirt were a set of hoof prints that followed the path for a while before veering of into the trees.

"I've heard that there are centaurs in here." Remus said softly.

"Cool!  I want to see a centaur." It was the first time all night that Peter had actually looked excited.

"Shh!" Sirius hissed. "If a centaur heard you talking about them like they were some interesting animal to be put on display, they'd probably kill you."

Peter looked startled.  This obviously didn't go well with the Muggle myths he'd heard about centaurs.

Remus nodded in agreement.  "Centaurs are very wise, but they also feel that they are superior to humans." He shrugged.  "They're probably right.  Centaurs live a very long time and they know things that most people would kill for, if there's any species on Earth that actually understands the meaning of life, it's probably them."

"You seem to know a lot about my people." a grave voice spoke behind them.  The Marauders whirled around to find themselves face to face with a centaur.  He had platinum-blonde hair, a gorgeous palomino body and eyes so blue they made even Sirius's crystal orbs look murky in comparison, and he looked very young.  Despite his youth, however, he had a regal air and there was something in his eyes that made him look as though he knew things that no mortal could ever fathom.

Remus blushed slightly.  "I meant no disrespect." he stammered

The centaur smiled, but the smile didn't quite reach his sad eyes.  "I know you did not.  On the contrary, I have never met a mortal who seemed to have a higher regard for the centaurs; most humans _are convinced that they are the supreme race," He inclined his head slightly to Remus, "but I expect that a werewolf is quite aware of that flaw in human nature."_

Two things kept Sirius for making an indignant reply on the behalf of his race; Remus's warning about disagreeing with a centaur, and shock that this stranger could know so much about his friend.

"You will find, however, that not even centaurs are all-knowing." the blue-eyed centaur continued, "I will leave you with a warning; be careful, the Forest is a dangerous place for students.  I bid you good-night."  With that he disappeared into the trees, leaving four thoroughly mystified Gryffindors standing on the trail.

As they gradually shook off the lingering effects of the centaur's presence and continued deeper into the Forest, they noticed some strange noises.  There was something rustling in the bushes some ways off the path and they heard an odd clicking noise.  They drew their wands and backed away from the sounds; the noise was getting closer and closer, but it was too dark to see what it was.  Remus took out his wand and muttered "_Lumos", but the light wasn't strong enough to illuminate the shadows between the trees._

Peter was shaking with fear, James's face was far paler than usual, Sirius was gripping his wand so tightly his knuckles were turning white, and Remus's palms were sweating.  Although they couldn't see what was approaching, they all had the distinct impression that it wasn't friendly.  Suddenly Peter let out a terrified scream as a huge spider materialized out of the blackness.  It was the size of a large dog, jet-black and hairy and it had huge jaws, which were making the clicking noise as it snapped them together.

"Run!" James and Sirius yelled in unison, pushing Peter, who seemed to have frozen in fear in front of them.  Remus didn't need telling twice, he took off after his friends as Peter regained his senses and fled.  For awhile it seemed like the spider was going to catch them, but their longer legs worked to their advantage and they outran it.  They didn't stop running until they had reached the edge of the Forest, where they had left James's cloak.  As they bent over, trying to catch their breath, they suddenly started laughing.  All their nerves transmitted into a maniacal laughter that left them rolling on the ground, gasping for breath.

"You shoulda seen your face, Pete!" Sirius crowed.  "You looked like you were about to faint."

"Yeah, well you weren't looking all too pleased yourself." Peter countered.

By the time they had gotten a hold of themselves and were walking toward the castle, they were talking about how cool the spider had been, completely forgetting their terror.  Just before they reached the doors, Sirius turned to the others.

"Do you guys really want to go back to Gryffindor Tower?" he asked.

None of them was eager for this night to come to an end, so they turned back around and walked to the edge of the lake.  They threw themselves down at the water's edge and lay there looking up at the stars and talking until the first rays of the sun broke over the horizon.  Feeling strangely energized despite the fact they hadn't slept a wink, they slipped the cloak back on and headed toward the castle.


	16. Food Fight!

A/N: Another short one.

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            Lunchtime at the Gryffindor table was always rather hectic, and today was no exception.  After their exhilarating night of exploring (and almost getting eaten by spiders the size of horses, as they were enthusiastically telling anyone who would listen), they had been stuck in Transfiguration for two hours with a very angry Professor McGonagall breathing down their necks.  Filch had informed her that James and Sirius had skipped detention again, and that he was sure they'd had help.  She felt that there was no proof that Remus or Peter had done anything wrong, but Sirius and James now had another week of detentions to serve, which they didn't really mind.  By now they were used to spending most of their nights cleaning up the castle without magic and they had already nearly doubled the previous school record for most detentions served in a year and the term wasn't even over.

            They had been forced to keep their energy bottled up all morning, and they were nearly ready to explode.  Sirius was humming a tune by a Muggle band called the Beatles that Peter had gotten him hooked on.  Sirius loved the music because it made absolutely no sense.  His favorite songs were "Yellow Submarine," "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds," and "Octopus's Garden."  

Next to Sirius, James was talking a mile a minute about how wicked cool it was that the Forbidden Forest had centaurs, spiders that were nearly as big as him, and probably all sorts of other things.  Remus was just nodding his agreement to everything James said, as his mouth was so stuffed with food that he couldn't speak.  Peter was adding in his own comments and egging James on in the rare instances where the taller boy stopped for a breath.

James broke off as he noticed a mischievous gleam in Remus's eye.  He followed his friend's gaze to where Sirius was winking at a couple of giggly girls at the Ravenclaw table.  He immediately began talking again to make sure Sirius didn't notice what was going on until… splat!  A spoonful of Remus's treacle tart hit Sirius square in the side of the head.  

The girls began to laugh hysterically as Sirius spun around, grabbed his plate full of French fries, ketchup, and chili and threw it across the table at Remus, who ducked.  It hit Peter full in the face and James yelled "FOODFIGHT!"

The rest of the table joined in, as Sirius launched himself at Remus and the two boys started to wrestle on the floor.  After a while some flying food hit people from other Houses, and the entire Great Hall joined in the fun.  Up at the High Table, the teachers looked shocked.  Professor McGonagall tried to restore order, but a flying cherry pie hit her in the face.

"THAT IS ENOUGH!!!" roared a very angry Professor McGonagall as pie slid down the front of her robes.  "IF I FIND OUT WHO STARTED THIS, THAT STUDENT WILL BE SERVING DETENTION UNTIL THE DAY THEY LEAVE THIS SCHOOL!  NOW, GET YOURSELVES UP TO YOUR DORMITORIES AND GET CHANGED! NOW!!!"

The Marauders fled up to Gryffindor Tower along with the rest of the House, laughing so hard there were tears running down their faces, mixing with all the food.  

"That was amazing, Moony!  I don't think I've ever seen Professor McGonagall so mad." James crowed.

Once they had showered and changed, they decided that going back to potions would ruin their good day, so they lounged around Gryffindor common room instead.  Sirius was rummaging through his Christmas presents when his eyes suddenly lit up.

"Hey guys, I have a brilliant idea!" he said excitedly.

The other three muttered something about Sirius's 'brilliant ideas' and how they always landed the Marauders in detention, but he ignored them and pulled out the map that he had gotten from Andromeda. 

"Why don't we make our _own map, and put _all_ the secret passages on it?" he suggested enthusiastically._

"Because then they wouldn't be secret." Peter answered.

Sirius just rolled his eyes.  "I swear, Pete, sometimes you can be incredibly dense.  All we'd have to do is put a spell on it so that only certain people could use it."

James and Remus seemed to be thinking.  "It wouldn't be too hard," Remus said slowly, "we'd just have to make it so we could add on as we found more passageways."

James nodded. "You know Sir, I think this is one of the better ideas you've come up with."

Sirius smiled.  "Let's get to work, then."

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Ever since he had dyed Bellatrix's hair just before Christmas break, Sirius had been waiting for her revenge.  By the time she had returned after the holidays, her hair was as black and beautiful as ever, but he knew that she would be out for his blood.  It happened one day as he was heading back toward Gryffindor common room after a detention with Professor Smeral; as he rounded a corner in the staircase, he found Bella waiting for him, wand drawn.

Sirius was an incredibly advanced dueler for his age, mostly because he had needed to learn how to protect himself from his older cousin, but Bellatrix had four years of training on him.  He had hardly gotten his wand from his pocket into his hand when her first curse hit him.  His entire body seized up in the Full Body Bind, and he fell over.  Only his eyes were able to move and he stared up into Bellatrix's dark eyes which held a familiar evil glint.

She kicked him in the side, hard and it was hard to tell whose eyes held more hatred as the cousins glared viciously at each other.  

"What's the matter, Sirius?" she taunted.  "Can't hold your own when there's no one around to protect you?"

His fury helped him get over the effects of the curse quicker than he would have otherwise; he had just gotten some feeling back in his extremities when she hit him with a curse Sirius had never seen before, one that hurt like hell.  Despite his pain, he kept his face carefully expressionless, trying to convince her that the Body Bind was still in effect.

She seemed to buy it, and lowered her guard slightly to taunt him some more.  He knew it was the best opportunity he was going to get; he whipped his wand up and shouted _"Expelliarmus!"_

Bella's wand flew up in the air and arched away from her.  Sirius could just barely sit up, but he knew he wasn't going to get anymore time.  He pointed his wand at her and thin cords sprang out of it and wrapped themselves around her, knocking her over and pinning her arms to her sides.

Suddenly a loud, angry voice behind him bellowed "MR. BLACK!"

He turned to find Professor McGonagall rushing up, scowling at him.  "Haven't you learned your lesson about dueling in the hallways?" Then she caught sight of Bellatrix, and her frown deepened. "Miss Black, as a prefect I would expect you to set a better example!  Fighting with your own family!  In all my time at Hogwarts, I have NEVER seen the likes of this!  20 points from Gryffindor. 40 from Slytherin; I am disgusted at this behavior from a PREFECT! I shall be talking to Professor Smeral about his choice in leadership!"

She waved her hand and Bellatrix's bindings disappeared along with the lingering effects of the Body Bind. "Now get to your common rooms, both of you."

They hastened to comply, but not before shooting withering glances at each other.  When Sirius climbed through the portrait-hole he found his friends sitting at their usual table finishing their homework.

"What took so long, Siri?" James called, motioning for Sirius to join them, but he just shook his head muttering something about being tired before heading off to bed.

"Sirius?" James called after him, confusion in his voice.

When the rest of the Marauders came upstairs a while later, Sirius pretended to be asleep.


	17. Happy Birthday, Sirius

Sirius Black had never enjoyed birthdays the way other children do.  As far back as he could remember his birthday gifts had just been reminders of how much of a disappointment he was to his blood-crazed family.  Sirius had never held with the belief that his pure blood made him better than other people, as his family had tried to impress on him.

One year his parents had given him an enormous silver plaque that was just an engraved copy of the Black family tree painted on the wall of the den.  Another time he received a book that traced the bloodlines of all the prominent pure-blood wizard families back to the time of the Greek Empire, it also listed the accomplishments of these wizards, focusing particularly on Salazar Slytherin.

This year was going to be different, though; for the first time in his life, Sirius had friends who accepted him for who he was.  He awoke early on the morning of his twelfth birthday to find two presents on the foot of his bed.  One was from his cousin Andromeda and the other was from his parents (he wasn't sure if he even wanted to know what it was).

Sirius jumped out of bed, flung open the curtains over the window, and crowed like a rooster.  A pillow hit him in the back of the head and when he turned around he saw the curtains around Remus's bed shut.  Sirius grinned; Remus was never much of a morning person.  There were groans of protest from Peter and James's beds, while Frank Longbottom continued to sleep.

"Rise and shine, Moony!  No sleeping in today!"

Sirius laughed as he caught a muffled "Shut up, jackass." from under the pile of blankets that was his friend.

James's laughed joined in as the messy-haired boy finished tying back his curtains.  Peter was still struggling with his.

"Happy birthday, Sir." he said, rolling out of bed and reaching under his mattress.  He pulled out a sloppily wrapped gift and handed it to Sirius.

"Come on Remy, you can't sleep in on Siri's birthday."

There was another sleepy grumble but the curtains drew back to reveal a head of tousled honey-brown hair and a drowsy smile.

"Happy birthday, mate." Remus said as he searched one-handedly under his bed without sitting up.

When all three of his friends were awake, Sirius sat down and began opening his gifts.  He started with the one from Andromeda; a lovely scarlet cloak with a golden Gryffindor lion embroidered on the back.  The note read:

Just don't give it to your mum to wash, I made that mistake and never got my cloak back!  Hope you have a wonderful day.  Love always, Andromeda.

Next he grabbed the box from James.  It was a huge package of Filibuster's new and Improved Fireworks that lasted for hours after going off, and the story of Godric Gryffindor.  Sirius looked gratefully at his best friend.  He had told James about the kind of gifts he got from his parents, and this was James's way of reminding him that no matter how badly his parents wanted him to be a Slytherin, Sirius had been put in Gryffindor for a reason.

Next came Remus's present, which was a large box much neater than James's.  Sirius ripped through the paper to find a box that said 'Sony Record Player' above a picture of something Sirius had never seen before.  He looked at Remus, puzzled.

"What is it?"

"It's a record player; it's a Muggle device that plays music."

Sirius opened the box, and stared expectantly at the record player, but nothing happened.  Remus and Peter laughed, and Peter handed his own gift to a very confused Sirius.  It was a couple of Beatles records with all of Sirius's favorite Muggle songs on them.

"It was Peter's idea; he remembered how much you liked his music." Remus informed Sirius.

Peter showed them how to put the record on and the voices of the Fab Four filled the room, eliciting sleepy protests from Frank Longbottom.

"Sorry, Frank." Sirius called, but he made no move to turn down the volume.  Frank muttered something about insane dorm mates who got up at unnatural hours of the morning.

The Marauders just laughed.  Sirius sobered slightly.

"Thanks guys, this is the best birthday I've ever had."

The other boys smiled and James reached over to ruffle Sirius's hair.

"You got one more present, Siri." James reminded him.

"Oh yeah, that one's from my parents so I apologize in advance if it's something about purebloods being superior to the rest of the world."

He opened the present and, not surprisingly, a book dropped out entitled Pureblood Pride: A Guide to the Most Powerful Wizard Families.  Sirius just rolled his eyes and threw it in the fire.  The other part of the gift, however, was something that no twelve year old boy would turn his nose up at: a pair of dragonhide boots.  They were designer boots, made of the skin of an extremely rare Norwegian Ridgeback.  They were midnight black with silver eyelets and dark green lapels.

"Slytherin colors, of course." Sirius muttered as he waved his wand over them and turned the green to black.

"I cannot believe you're complaining about a brand new pair of dragonhide boots!" James cried.  "That's blasphemy." 

Remus chuckled.  "Yeah, Siri, I thought you said you're parents gave you horrible presents."

"Normally they do, but I think I know why I got these.  Malfloy got a really nice pair of Hebridean Blacks for Christmas, so my dad felt like he had to show Darryl Malfloy up."

The other boys just rolled their eyes and James muttered something about 'egomaniacal purebloods.'

"What do you boys say we go get some food and head over to Hogsmeade for the day?  History of Magic and Care of Magical Creatures isn't exactly my idea of a fun birthday." Sirius proposed.

"I wanna hit the showers first." Remus said as he rolled out of bed.  

"Oh good, I wasn't going to say anything, Remy, but you stink." James quipped.

Remus whacked him on the back of the head as he walked past.  Five minutes later, showered and dressed, the Marauders headed to the Great Hall with Sirius proudly showing off his new boots.  James fell in line behind Sirius as they descended the stairs to the common room and pointed his wand at his friend's back.  He muttered something under his breath, causing scarlet and gold ribbons to bloom from the end of his wand and form words on the back of Sirius's robes.  There was a big red balloon with a gold 12 inside and the words 'Birthday Boy' written above it in alternating letters.

They entered the Great Hall a few minutes later, and when the other students saw Sirius's robes they burst out laughing.  Sirius looked slightly confused, but he followed the gazes of his classmates and realized what they were looking at.  He craned his neck around until he could see the message, and grinned at James who started singing "Happy Birthday."  The rest of the Hall, minus the Slytherins joined in, and even Professor Dumbledore took part.

When the singing ended, Sirius stood up on the table and bowed, obviously loving the attention.  Dumbledore started clapping.

"A very happy birthday to you, Mr. Black." he smiled.

"Thanks, Professor!" Sirius called happily.

The Marauders sat down and began heaping their plates with food, and eventually the other students lost interest and turned back to their own breakfasts.  Sirius had his mouth full of food, discussing where he wanted to go first when they got to Hogsmeade, when to his mild surprise, Krissy sat down next to him.  He swallowed his rather large mouthful and was about to ask her what was up, when she suddenly leaned over and kissed him.  She jumped up, blushing furiously, and hurried over to join the other girls.  They whispered and giggled together while the Marauders stared open-mouthed at a very red-faced Sirius.

Sirius forgot about his food for probably the first time all year, and kept repeating things like "She kissed me… just came over and kissed me…" and glancing over at the girls, who left hurriedly.

By the time the other three boys had finished eating and left the Great Hall, the normal, cocky Sirius was back and they had to spend the rest of the walk to Hogsmeade listening to him brag.

"Did you boys see that?  Women can't keep their hands off me!" he smirked.

Remus snorted and James hit him on the back of the head, but Peter was still staring in awe.

"Pete, close your mouth before you catch a fly." James teased him.

"Oh, he's just amazed at how smooth I am with women." Sirius kidded.  

Peter blushed and clamped his mouth shut just as they arrived at the mirror covering the passage to Hogsmeade.  Fifteen minutes later they were sipping butterbeers in the Three Broomsticks and chatting with the beautiful waitress.

"So boys, ditching school again, or did you have another Quidditch match?" Madam Rosemerta asked playfully.

"It's Siri's birthday, so we wanted to come celebrate." James told her.

She smiled, revealing perfectly white teeth.  "Well happy birthday, Sirius.  I need to go help some of the other customers, but you should go next door and check out the chocolate cake." She headed back toward the bar, but stopped half way there and turned back to the Marauders.  "By the way, I love your robes!" she winked at them, turned on her sparkling green heels and was gone.

James laughed and clapped Sirius on the back.  "I gotta agree with her there, mate."

"Prat"

They started elbowing each other playfully and were about to start a full-blown wrestling match in the middle of the Three Broomsticks, when Sirius caught sight of Peter across the table.  He was slightly red in the face and still staring at Madam Rosemerta as she walked between the tables carrying drinks to her customers.

"I think Pete's a little warm." he said, looking at the other two boys with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

"I think he's enjoying the view." Remus agreed, glancing over at Madam Rosemerta's short skirt.

"I think he liked the front view better." James added, referring to the cleavage-revealing top she had on.

Peter blushed even harder.  "Don't know what you guys are talking about." he muttered.

The other three laughed heartily at their friend's discomfort.  

"I think our little boy's growing up." Sirius said, trying to sound like an over-emotional mother and sounding more like a boy with a head cold.

James sniffed loudly, but his eyes were glittering devilishly.  "I think it's time we told him about the birds and the bees."

The smallest Marauder looked at him, horrified, obviously thinking James would launch into an explanation of sex right then and there, which he probably would have if Sirius and Remus hadn't dissolved into helpless laughter.  James was unable to keep a straight face and soon all three of them were leaning on the table for support as they laughed until tears ran down their faces and Peter blushed an even darker red.

Peter's embarrassment did have one positive side effect, though; Sirius was so busy teasing his friend that he forgot to boast about being kissed by one of the prettiest first years in the school.

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When they returned to Gryffindor Tower that night, the Marauders found all of the first year girls whispering in a corner of the common room.  As soon as the boys walked in, they stopped talking and just stared.  Krissy kept looking over at Sirius, blushing, and looking away.

Remus nudged Sirius, "Hey man, you better go talk to her.  You can't expect her to make all the moves."

"This from the guy who won't even admit that he has a thing for Lindy Moline." Sirius retorted, but he knew Remus was right.

"Come on Sir, I thought you were a ladies' man." James ribbed him.

Sirius laughed nervously before getting up and walking over to where the girls were sitting.  He said something to Krissy and offered his hand to help her up.  She took it and they climbed through the picture hole together.  The rest of the girls came over and sat down with the other three Marauders.

"How cute is that?" Jenna Thompson, a black-haired girl cooed.  

"I knew it would happen eventually." Alice Collins smirked.  "In fact, Lily, you owe me five Sickles."

"You bet on whether or not Sirius and Krissy would go out?" James laughed, "I can't believe you took that bet, Evans."

Lily glared at James as she dug in her pockets for the money.  "I thought Krissy had better tastes than that." she answered coolly.

"Better than dating the most popular boy in school?  Are you daft?"  Jenna sounded shocked.

"Excuse me, ladies, but Krissy's dating Sirius, not me." James reminded them.

Everyone chuckled and rolled their eyes tolerantly, except for Lily who looked truly annoyed.  

"You are the most arrogant, pig-headed little boy I have ever met!" she exploded.  "You think just because you can perform a few spells before the rest of the class that you should be allowed to ditch whenever you want and pull all your stupid pranks."

"I don't expect any special treatment, and trust me, I don't get it.  I get detentions just like the rest of you, I just happen to think having fun is worth it." James replied angrily.

Lily's nostrils flared as her eyes narrowed in a glare that reminded James a little of Professor McGonagall.  She seemed to be about to say something, but decided against it and ran up the stairs to the girls' dorm.

"What's her problem?" James asked, trying to sound casual, but the good mood of earlier was gone.  Gradually the rest of the girls departed and James, Remus and Peter were left alone in their corner.

A couple hours later Krissy and Sirius came back, hand in hand.  When she saw that her friends weren't there, she whispered something to Sirius, hugged him, and walked up the stairs to her dorm.  Sirius motioned to the Marauders to follow him up the other staircase.  They entered their dorm to find Frank Longbottom sitting on his bed doing homework.

"Oh, hey Frank."

Frank looked up into the faces of his four crazy roommates.  "You guys want some privacy?" he asked.

"Come on, man, do you really think we'd run you out of your own dorm?" James teased.

"No, you just wake me up at ungodly hours of the morning." he quipped.  Frank was even less of a morning person than Remus.

"Yeah, sorry about that, mate." Sirius apologized.

"No worries.  By the way happy birthday.  Did you guys have fun ditching?"

"Of course, anything's more fun than History of Magic."

"That's true.  So what were you guys whispering about just now?"

"Sirius just asked Krissy out." James supplied.

"I see, I was wondering how long it would take.  I heard about that kiss this morning at the breakfast table."

"So I guess the whole school knows by now." Sirius laughed.

"Well gossip does get around this school pretty quick, and the Great Hall is a pretty public place."

Sirius shrugged, "That was just a little peck.  We went up to the Astronomy Tower for…"

"Sirius!" Remus cut him off.  "Do you think Krissy wants to go bragging about what you two have been doing for a couple of hours?"

"Oh come on, Moony, she's doing the same thing with the girls right now."

James laughed.  "With Krissy, you're probably right."

They spent a few more minutes discussing girls, but soon they were too confused so they switched gears to talk about something that was easier to understand.  Eventually they started talking about their favorite Quidditch teams and about what positions they would play if they made the House team.


	18. Pranks and Potions

The next few weeks passed in a flurry of commotion; between all the homework their teachers piled on them to make sure they hadn't forgotten anything over the break, testing out their Christmas presents and landing themselves in more detentions with Filch, and working on their map, they had absolutely no free time even on weekends.  One Friday morning found the Marauders in Potions trying to figure out how to make a Transforming Solution which was supposed to turn their white lab rats into toads.  Sirius was partnering Remus while James, who was the more patient of the two, was working with Peter.  

"Someone's got to help you two dolts pass this class." Sirius had reasoned.

Sirius was leaning back in his chair, telling Remus what to add and when to do it.  Under his guidance, Remus's potion was the correct color for once and nothing was exploding; however, Smeral didn't seem to notice this.  Instead he was praising Severus Snape, his teacher's pet, like he did every day.  Remus had to admit, however greasy and annoying Snape was, he did have a knack for potions.  Sirius was not as reasonable on the topic; it was a little known fact that he and James were neck and neck for the highest marks of all the first year students (and most of the older ones also), except for Potions where Snape had the highest grade, and that irritated Sirius to no end.

So when Smeral turned his back to them, Sirius pulled out a Wet Start Firework and threw it into Snape's cauldron.  The firework immediately exploded, throwing Transforming Solution into the air.  Some of it splashed on Snape and Narcissa, who was partnering him, and on the Slytherins who were sitting around them.  One girl was turned completely into a toad, while the rest began to develop gills, huge mouths with long tongues or frog-like skin.  Professor Smeral immediately turned on Sirius, although he hadn't actually seen the boy throw it.

"30 points from Gryffindor, Mr. Black, and a week of detentions!" Smeral taunted happily.

Sirius was about to snarl something in return when a girl's voice spoke up from the other side of the class.

"It wasn't him, Professor."

The Marauders and Professor Smeral all turned to look in the direction of the voice, and Krissy Miller stared back defiantly.

"She's right, sir.  It came from over there." Lindy Moline lied, her gaze flicking to Remus for a moment before meeting Smeral's furious eyes and pointing to a group of Slytherins near the Marauders.

Smeral's lip curled, but he knew he had no proof that it was Sirius.  "Fine!" he barked.  "Gryffindor can have their points back."

He swept toward Sirius, glaring daggers, before stopping to inspect his potion.  To Smeral's fury, the potion was perfect.  He growled deep in his throat, but they were saved by the bell that signaled the end of class.  Sirius let out a sigh of relief as Smeral stormed away and they packed up their ingredients; Gryffindor really couldn't afford to loose any more points.

They waited outside the Potions dungeon for Krissy and Lindy, who finally appeared surrounded by their friends.  The Gryffindor first years faced each other, with the exception of Frank Longbottom who had already left to catch up with his Ravenclaw friends.

"Thanks, ladies." Sirius said, his face breaking into that charming grin of his as he gave Krissy a hug.

Krissy shrugged.  "Smeral's an ass, even if it was you he had no right to assume." 

"And Gryffindor can't really afford to loose any more points.  I'd blame you four for loosing most of them, but you earn more points than the rest of us also." Lindy added, her green eyes sparkling mirthfully.

            "Hey Sirius, wanna skip History of Magic with me today?" Krissy asked, a naughty gleam in her eyes.  Sirius's face took on the same expression.

            "Choose between you and Professor Binns, do you even have to ask?"

            They walked away hand in hand, heading for someplace more private, while their friends just rolled their eyes.

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            James looked across the Transfiguration classroom to where Sirius was sulking in the back row.  Professor McGonagall had separated them and given them detention for turning their salamanders into a baby dragon.  Yesterday had been full moon, so Remus was still in the hospital wing and Peter was concentrating on Professor McGonagall's every word because they had a rather large test coming up.  

Careful that McGonagall didn't see him, he pointed his wand at Sirius's quill, which was lying forgotten on his desk.  He picked up his own quill and began to write as Sirius's quill imitated his own.  The blue-eyed boy's frown gradually disappeared as he watched his bewitched quill write messages by itself.

Hey Siri, you look a little bored over there.     He grinned at Sirius who smirked back and pointed his own wand at James's quill.  James let go and the quill immediately began writing in Sirius's familiar handwriting.

Never!  You know how much I love listening to McGonagall bitch at me because I already know this shit.

James had to stifle a chuckle at that.

Well, why don't we give her something to bitch about?

I love the way your mind works, James, my boy.

Got anything on you that explodes?

Always.

On three…

One…

Two…

Three!

The two boys went all out.  There was a huge explosion followed by a revolting smell as about twenty dungbombs and a large supply of fireworks and even a few poppers went off simultaneously from opposite ends of the classroom.  There was immediate chaos as people plugged their noses and tried to duck as fireworks zoomed around the classroom.

"BLACK! POTTER! DETENTION!" McGonagall screeched.

They laughed, and then gagged on the disgusting smell.  Someone had already opened the window, and Professor McGonagall  vanished the fireworks, but the smell still lingered.  She seemed to realize that she wouldn't be able to regain the student's attention with the classroom stinking abominably, so she allowed the rest of the class to leave a few minutes early, but made Sirius and James wait after.

"In all my years, I have NEVER met a pair of students with such blatant disregard for rules!  Obviously cleaning the school is not enough incentive for you two to behave yourselves, so I'm going to try another approach.  In Muggle schools they make children write lines.  Maybe writing the same sentence for four hours after dinner will teach you not to pull pranks in my class.  Now get out!"

They hurried out of the class and collapsed in the corridor laughing.  "Writing lines! That's a good one.  For a minute there I thought she was going to say we couldn't try out for the Quidditch team next year!" James panted between chuckles.

"That was my thought too, mate." Sirius shook his head.  "In all my years!" he mimicked.  "She's probably what twenty five?" they started laughing again.

"Let's go visit Remus." James suggested, "I've got some of those toffees he liked so much last time we were in Hogsmeade."

It was the first full moon since the Marauders had found out about Remus's lycanthropy, and they had done everything in their power to make life easier on their werewolf friend.  To save Remus from having to make up another sick relative, they told anyone who asked that he had been the victim of a prank gone wrong and was currently in the hospital wing with whiskers and bright green skin.  They even took notes for him so that he wouldn't have as much make up work to do when he got back.

When they got to the infirmary they found Remus sitting up in bed, reading.  He was paler than ever and there were dark bags under his eyes.  One of his arms was bandaged and he looked exhausted, but the smile that crossed his face when he saw them was genuine.  

"Hey Remy, we brought you some candy." James said, fishing in his pockets and withdrawing some Sugar Quills and Fizzing Wizzbies.

"Thanks guys, sugar always helps after a transformation." Remus said quietly.

They all realized from his sober voice that he was thanking them for more than just the candy.  Remus still couldn't believe that they hadn't deserted him.

"Sure thing, Moony." Sirius replied as he pulled up a chair and swung a leg over backwards to lean against the high back of the chair.  He glanced from the bandages on Remus's left arm to the mix of old scars and still- healing cuts on his right before looking back into Remus's eyes.

"Are those self-inflicted?" he asked quietly.

Remus looked into those concerned blue eyes noting that it was strange to see Sirius being… well serious.  What most people didn't realize about crazy boy with his devil-may-care attitude was that Sirius was fiercely loyal to his friends.  It pained him to see one of them hurting and know that there was nothing he could do for them.

"Yeah." Remus said softly.

"God, Remus, I wish there was some way we could help."

Remus shrugged.  "I appreciate the sentiments, but there's nothing anyone can do."

"We took notes for you." James said in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Remus arched an eyebrow.  "You three actually took notes?"

James grinned and Sirius put on a mock-offended expression while Peter spoke up indignantly.  "Hey!  I take notes."

Remus smiled.  "Sorry, Pete, I guess I should have said 'these two actually took notes."

"Yes, well, some of us have better things to do with our time." Sirius said airily.

Remus snorted.  "Such as get detentions?" 

Sirius just grinned in reply.

"So, Remy, you gonna eat that candy or what?" Peter spoke up.

Remus laughed.  "Go for it." 

The smallest Marauder grinned as he stuffed a Fizzing Wizzbie in his mouth.  Remus offered some to the other two who shook their heads.

James suddenly shot a curious look at Remus.  "Hey Moony, where do you go when you transform?  I mean you can't just stay here, right?"

 "No, for one I'd attack the other patients, and even if there weren't any, I'd destroy the room."

Sirius cocked his head sideways, trying to think of a place that would be suitable.  "So where do you go?"

"The Shrieking Shack."

"I heard some third years talking about that when they got back from Hogsmeade.  They said some violent ghosts had just moved in, but I guess that would just be you they're hearing, right?" Sirius reasoned.

Remus nodded.  "Dumbledore had it built for me when he decided I could come to Hogwarts.  They also planted the Whomping Willow over the entrance to the passage so that people like you two wouldn't try to follow it."

"Whoa, they built the Shrieking Shack and planted the Whomping Willow all for you?  That must be some kind of ego booster." Sirius grinned.

Remus rolled his eyes, "Yeah it helps my self-esteem so much that all these precautions have to be made so I don't kill anyone."

"Just kidding, buddy, take it easy!" Sirius laughed.

Just then Madam Pomfrey appeared.  "Ok boys, visiting time is over.  You're late for dinner and Remus needs his rest."

"See ya later, Moony." James said as Sirius threw him a salute.


	19. One More for the Road

The Marauders were in the library when the Gryffindor girls came in looking for some peace and quiet; the O.W.L.s were coming up for fifth year students and the Gryffindor prefects were in such foul moods that they had been giving out detentions if anyone dared to so much as sneeze in the common room and disturb their studying.  James was helping Peter study for a big test coming up in Transfiguration and Remus was going looking up different spells, making sure he had them all memorized.  Sirius was absently paging through a large book looking of pranks.  

Krissy Miller led her little group over to the table the Marauders were sitting at.  "Do you boys mind if we join you?" she asked.

The boys looked up.  Sirius grinned at her and motioned for them to pull up some chairs while his three friends looked slightly uncomfortable.  Sirius and Krissy had been going out long enough that they were used to her presence, but having all the girls there at once still made them slightly nervous; Sirius had the feeling that for Remus and James, it was the presence of Lily and Lindy, respectively that made them act like fools.  The girls sat down and took out their books.

"So what are you looking at?" Krissy asked Sirius.  She leaned over him to see what the book was about.  "Curses?  Shouldn't you be studying for Transfig?"

"Sirius and I have a bet on that he can't ace all McGonagall's tests without studying." James broke in.

"McGonagall gives practical exams.  It'll be the easiest fifteen Galleons I've ever made." Sirius said dismissively.

Lily Evans rolled her eyes.  "You'll fail the End of Term Exams," she told him, "then you won't be able to come back for second year."  Sirius just raised an eyebrow challengingly.  Lily suddenly squealed as her chair transformed into a huge white stallion and began pawing the ground and snorting.   

"Sirius!" James scolded as he offered a hand to help Lily of the horse as it began to rear.

Sirius laughed as Lily shrieked and grabbed James's hand.  She slid off the horse and nearly lost her balance, but James caught her.

"I give you a great excuse for holding Evans, and you bitch at me." Sirius tutted at his best friend as he turned the great white horse back into a chair.

It was hard to tell who looked more furious; James or Lily, but their responses were cut of by Madam Hooch swooping down on them.

"Mr. Black!" she screeched, "What in the name of Merlin do you think you're doing!  This is a library, not a zoo.  Get out and I don't want to see you back in here for the rest of the year!  Move!" with that she turned on her heel and stomped away.

Sirius fought back a grin and turned to Krissy.

"Wanna find something more interesting to do?" his eyes sparkled devilishly, leaving no doubt in anyone's mind just what he wanted to do.  "I'll help you out with the Transfiguration crap later."

She smiled impishly at him.  "I'm sure we could find something to do if you're bored."

Everyone groaned.  "Get a room, you two." James said.  Sirius just winked as he and Krissy walked toward the door.

A few hours later he sauntered into their dorm with a cocky grin and threw himself down on his bed, ignoring the inquiring stares of his best friends.  Finally curiosity got the best of them, and James broke the silence.

"So where'd you go, you didn't spend this whole time in the Astronomy Tower, did you?"

"Nah, went to Hogsmeade" Sirius shrugged.

"WHAT?"

"Don't worry, she's not the type to tell on us for sneaking out of the castle."

James considered and finally seemed to decide his friend was right.

"So what did you do?" Remus asked.

Sirius shrugged.  "Showed her the town, introduced her to Madam Rosemerta, found a place to make out, you know, the usual."  Again his was unable to keep his voice casual as he fought the grin trying to spread across his handsome face.

Remus rolled his eyes.  "I swear one of these days you're going to have a girlfriend who doesn't like it when you kiss and tell."

Sirius just shrugged again.  "That's their problem, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it."

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

Gryffindor lost in their last Quidditch match versus Slytherin, which gave Slytherin the Cup for the sixth year in a row.  The entire school was in low spirits that day, except for the Slytherins who paraded around as though they owned the place; picking on younger students and starting fights.  Sirius was so mad about loosing the Cup that he almost wanted to go find Bellatrix and wipe the smirk of her face, but other than at meal times, he hadn't seen Bellatrix since McGonagall caught them fighting on the stairs up to Gryffindor Tower.  She had obviously realized that if she were to stand any chance of being made Head Girl in two years (she had the highest marks of any girl in her year) she couldn't afford getting caught dueling in the halls with younger students.

She wasn't above sending others to do her dirty work, though and before they could get back to Gryffindor Tower from the Quidditch Pitch, Malfloy showed up flanked by Crabbe and Goyle.  The satisfied sneer on his face nearly made Sirius attack him before he had opened his mouth.  It was only a restraining hand on his arm that stopped him from launching himself at the blonde boy.

"That's another year that your precious Gryffindor has lost to Slytherin, Black.  How does it feel?  Now who do you think is stronger?" Malfloy taunted.

"Gryffindor will always be stronger, Malfloy, because we take only the best wizards and don't worry about their backgrounds." Sirius growled.

Malfloy just laughed coolly. "Oh, but Sirius, even in Gryffindor all of Slytherin's beliefs are proved right.  All your bright, strong wizards come from wizard families, and the Mudbloods" he sneered at Peter, "are bumbling fools like this one."

He hardly had gotten the words out when three bodies launched themselves at him.  Crabbe and Goyle just blinked stupidly for a moment as Malfloy disappeared under a flurry of punches.  They glanced from Remus, Sirius and James on top of Malfloy to Peter, alone looking scared and decided to go after the small, defenseless boy.  Peter squealed as the two huge third years approached him, drawing the attention of James and Remus, who went to help their friend as Sirius continued to pummel Malfloy.

Crabbe had a hold of Peter's collar with one hand and his other was cocked back to punch, when Remus got to him.  Remus was as tall as Crabbe, but only about a third as wide, but he had the strength of a wolf on his side.  He grabbed Crabbe's fist and used it to yank him backwards away from Peter.  Crabbe was so startled by being treated the same way he treated younger kids, that he released Peter. 

 James slipped between his small friend and Goyle, who was looking confused by the latest turn of events.  Neither of Malfoy's bodyguards could be considered intelligent, and they were virtually unable to think on their feet.  Without Malfloy telling him what to do, Goyle could only try to use his sheer size to achieve whatever he wanted, which was little help when James used a Stunning Spell on him.

Malfloy was currently cowering and whimpering under Sirius's blows, but Sirius was in a rage.  He released years of pent up anger at his family and the people they associated with on the boy he had been told by his parents to look up to.  He didn't notice the professor running up behind him, yelling for him to get off Malfloy, but suddenly he found himself flying through the air.

He landed on his feet and spun around, and found himself staring at little Professor Flitwick.  He almost laughed out loud in relief, if McGonagall had caught him fighting with Slytherins again… then he caught what Flitwick was saying and his heart fell.

"Detentions with Mr. Filch until he decides that you have learned your lessons!"

"But Professor, we'll be there until we graduate!" James argued.

"You should have thought about that before starting _another fight at school, Mr. Potter."  James and Sirius just grumbled, but Remus spoke up._

"Professor Flitwick, Peter wasn't fighting.  He shouldn't get detention, too."  Peter looked slightly surprised; after all the fight had been about him, even if he wasn't involved.

Sirius and James nodded their agreement. "Malfloy was insulting Peter's family and we attacked him.  Peter didn't do anything." Sirius added.

"Very well, the six of you have detentions, Mr. Pettigrew is free to go."

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          

Sirius Black and James Potter sat in the back of the Transfiguration classroom, their heads bent together as they studied off a small piece of parchment.  These notes were not from any of their classes, nor was the spell they were about to perform something that their professors would approve of.  It was very advanced magic, and if they pulled it off they would probably be spending the last week before the end-of-year exams waxing every surface in the entire castle, but that was what made the prospect so amusing.  Exams started in two days and they wanted to squeeze in one last trick.

This prank was to be their best so far; the biggest troublemakers Hogwarts had ever known had to go out with a bang.  Since it was Sirius's idea he got the honor of performing the actual spell, but he wouldn't have been able to do it without his partners in crime.  Remus had logged many long hours in the library over the last few weeks looking up the spell, in addition to studying for exams and finishing all the homework he had missed at the last full moon, because neither Sirius nor James had the patience to look at a book for that amount of time.

James got the job of ensuring that the rest of the school found out about their prank, and Peter would cause a distraction so that Sirius and James could pull off their parts right under McGonagall's nose.  It had taken over a month of practice and preparation and it was going to be the culmination of everything they had done all year.  They had chosen McGonagall's class because of its central location in the castle and because Sirius loved nothing more than to push her buttons; McGonagall was the strictest teacher at the school, and it made her the target of many of their stunts.

Sirius looked over his notes one last time to make sure they were fully memorized (this was the first time since arriving at Hogwarts that he had ever bothered to memorize anything) before incinerating them with a simple spell.  He nodded at Peter who was looking slightly nervous.

Peter took his cue and began whispering loud enough for McGonagall to overhear.  "Hey guys, did you see that pet tarantula Jason Marks had yesterday?  It was huge!" he said the first thing that came to his mind.

McGonagall turned to glare at Peter.  "Mr. Pettigrew, do you have something you would like to share with the class?" she asked stiffly.

"Er, no ma'am." Peter squeaked.

"I am tired of you four disrupting my class.  You will sit here for the rest of the term." She flicked her wand and an empty seat appeared in the far corner of the classroom.  Peter slowly gathered up his supplies and tried to look disappointed about being separated from his friends, but he had to fight back a smile.  Things couldn't be going more perfectly.

In order to really distract McGonagall, he had to be far enough away from Sirius that she couldn't see the black-haired boy while talking to Peter.  A few minutes later they had received the feathers that they were supposed to turn into a ball of yarn.  Peter pointed his wand at the feather and muttered something; he had been practicing the spell with Remus, and the feather immediately caught fire.

Peter pretended to panic and drug his sleeve through the fire in a fake attempt to put it out.  The baggy sleeves of his robes caught fire and he yelped as the flames licked his skin.  Suddenly the heat vanished and the pain turned into a pleasant tickling sensation.  He continued to squeal in pretend pain, throwing a thankful look at Remus who was trying to look surprised and worried while murmuring the incantation for a Flame Freezing spell under his breath.

Sirius had already taken advantage of the momentary chaos; by the time Professor McGonagall reached Peter and put the fire out, he had transformed her desk into a raging bull.  The animal charged around the room for a moment until it caught sight of James who had turned his robes red and was wearing a long billowing cape.  The red cape infuriated the bull and it turned to charge at James, but the messy-haired youth had already ran out the door.

With the bull racing after him, James dashed up the corridor, yelling and laughing as loud as he could.  Up and down the hall, doors opened and teachers poked their heads out to see what all the commotion was about.  Students leapt out of their seats and crowded behind their professors to see what was going on.  When they saw James Potter being chased down the hall by a crazed bull, no one was surprised.  People laughed and rolled their eyes and some even cheered him on; everyone at Hogwarts knew of the four crazy first years that called themselves the Marauders and lived to drive their teachers insane.

By the time James had reached the end of the hallway, Professor McGonagall was running after him and the other teachers seemed to overcome their surprise to realize that the boy would be in serious danger if he was caught by the angry bull.

James was fast, but the bull was gaining quickly and the hall was only so long.  Just when the bystanders though James had cornered himself, he leapt over the railing- and landed on a staircase that was in the process of moving up to join their floor.  He hit the steps running and was already on the first landing when the top of the staircase connected with the hall.

With James no longer running before him, the bull began to loose interest and looked around for other targets, so James took off his cloak and waved it toward the large animal, yelling to get its attention.  The bull charged again, but stopped nervously at the top stair.  

"Toro, toro!" James taunted, using something he had seen on a Muggle television once.

Just as he'd seen on the TV, the bull became enraged and it decided to bypass the steps and just jump onto the landing.  James was about to turn and run down the stairs, when the bull suddenly changed back into a desk in mid-leap.

James looked up at the top of the stairs to see a very red-faced Professor McGonagall staring down at him, looking more outraged than James had ever seen her.  The students who were still watching the chase broke into applause, and James grinned.  Wrong move; McGonagall's lips became so thin they seemed to have been drawn on her face by a pencil and her eyes narrowed dangerously.  James climbed the stairs apprehensively, and as soon as he was within reach, McGonagall grabbed him roughly by the ear.

"What in the name of Merlin were you thinking?" she bellowed.  "You could have been killed!  Some innocent student could have been injured!  BLACK!"

Sirius stepped forward from the group of Gryffindor students standing in front of the Transfiguration room, slipping his wand back into his robes.  He's had it trained on the bull since the moment it chased James out the door, ready to perform the counter-spell if it got too close to his best friend.  He was grinning from ear to ear, which further infuriated Professor McGonagall.

"You gotta admit, Professor it was pretty impressive magic." He said, flashing his million-dollar smile that could make any girl in the room swoon and most professors let him off the hook.

It didn't work on McGonagall, though, and his smile turned into a slight grimace of pain as she grabbed his ear and twisted it harshly. 

"Don't you tell me what I have to do, young man." she growled.

He looked over at James who winked, and his grin reappeared.  This seemed to frustrate Professor McGonagall who dragged the two boys off down the hall, to the continued applause of their fellow students.  

As they were hauled past the other two Marauders, Remus winked at them.  "See you guys in Herbology." he said, sounding extremely amused that he and Peter were getting off the hook.

"Thanks, Moony." James said sarcastically.  He quickly shut up as McGonagall gave his ear a painful twist. 

McGonagall lead dragged them down passageway after passageway, up two flights of stairs, and through a hidden door (one glance at Sirius confirmed James's suspicion that his best friend was carefully memorizing the route and filing it away to add to the Marauders' Map) and finally into a hall that neither of them had been in before, which was saying something.

Professor McGonagall stopped them in front of a large gargoyle statue and said "Fizzing Wizzbee."  Sirius and James blinked at each other in surprise, when the gargoyle suddenly moves over to reveal a hidden door.  Professor McGonagall strode forward, still holding the two boys by their ears.  They climbed a marble staircase and stopped in front of a large wooden door.

Professor McGonagall finally released Sirius to knock on the door, but kept a firm hold of James, who glared at his best friend for getting off easy.

"It's unlocked." called a familiar voice.

The boys looked at each other apprehensively; it was the first time they had been sent to the headmaster's office and neither of them was sure what Dumbledore would do, but on the other hand, it was a great way to end the year.  Professor McGonagall pushed the door open and shoved the two boys inside.

"Good afternoon, Minerva." Professor Dumbledore said cheerfully.  "What have these two young troublemakers done today?"

Professor McGonagall looked slightly miffed at Dumbledore's light tone, and she answered rather stiffly.  "They seemed to think it amusing to transfigure my desk into a raging bull and have it chase Mr. Potter around the corridor."

Dumbledore's face was serious, but his blue eyes were twinkling merrily, which the boys took to be a good sign.  "Transfigured your desk, did you say?  That's very impressive."

James and Sirius broke into huge grins, but Professor McGonagall's lips pursed together.

"I'll be the first to admit that these boys are very advanced for their age, but that does not excuse such behavior.  Someone could have been hurt!"

"We were careful, Professor, honest." Sirius broke in.

"That's enough, Mr. Black!" Professor McGonagall cut him off.

"Now, Minerva, if we want to find an appropriate punishment, I think we need to hear their side of the story."  Dumbledore chided softly.

James thought it best to let Sirius handle the explanation and hope that his natural charm worked better on Dumbledore than McGonagall.

"Well, sir," Sirius began.  "I was really impressed when Professor McGonagall turned her desk into a pig on the first day of school, and I really wanted to learn how to do that instead of transfiguring feathers into rats and stuff like that, so me and James looked up the spell…" 

The Marauders had a pact that if one of them every got caught they wouldn't turn in the others, so Sirius would leave Remus and Peter's parts out. 

"and we thought that turning it into a bull would be a bit more, um, entertaining than a pig.  With the exams so close, everyone is really tense, so we thought it would be nice to have some comic relief.  Anyways, we've been practicing for a long time and we finally got the spell right, so we decided to perform it today.  We both know the reversal spell, and if it got too close to James, we were going to turn it back into a bull, but we wanted to give everyone a good laugh first."  Sirius looked expectantly at Dumbledore, his big blue eyes looking innocent, and flashing his winning smile.

"Well, it sounds like there was very little danger," he turned to Professor McGonagall, "and I'm sure you do not want them expelled for such a silly joke, especially when they have the best marks in their year, and since I've heard they are both very talented on the Quidditch pitch."  His eyes were definitely sparkling now.  "We both know Gryffindor could use some good players; six years without the Cup…"

Professor McGonagall was looking extremely peeved, but seemed to agree with the part about the Quidditch team.  McGonagall was the head of Gryffindor House, and wasn't without a health sense of competition.  

"Of course not, Albus, but I've tried everything I can think of as far as punishments go and nothing has worked." she said.

"Yes, I see the point.  Well as long as no one is hurt in their pranks, and they don't mind spending all their spare time in detention, a little excitement is good for Hogwarts." he said, blue eyes glittering merrily. 

McGonagall looked shocked.  "But Professor!"

"I'm sorry, Minerva, but I don't know what else to tell you… unless you'd like to hand them over to Filch and see if his ideas of discipline work, but I'm sure that would result in some very angry letters from parents."

"Of course not, but there must be some measures taken.  These two are completely uncontrollable!"

"And two of the brightest students Gryffindor has known in a long time." Dumbledore added, causing Sirius and James to blush slightly.  It was one thing to know they were very smart for their ages, but quite another to be told by one of the greatest wizards of the age.

"That's as it may be.  Very well, I guess they will just get another week of detentions.  I believe you will be going three weeks into next term." 

James and Sirius grinned at each other; they'd gotten off the hook again!


	20. Torturing the Slime Ball

            The students of Hogwarts all breathed sighs of relief when the bell rang to signal the end of their last exam of the term.  The Marauders rolled up their History of Magic essays and handed them to Professor Binns as he glided through the rows rambling on in his monotonous voice.  He seemed to be the only one in the entire school who hadn't noticed that school was out for another year, but then again, he hadn't noticed his own death either.

Students piled out of classrooms, whooping for joy while some of the Muggle-born children chanted "no more pencils, no more books, no more teachers' dirty looks!" and their friends asked what pencils were.

Sirius seemed to be the only student in the entire school who was dreading the coming vacation.  As the end of term approached, his normally good mood had been turning dark.  He seemed to be going into overdrive with the pranks, storing up as many good memories as possible to get him through the coming months; he wasn't looking forward to his family's reaction about his being sorted into Gryffindor.

The four boys joined the throng of students heading outside to enjoy their freedom.  There was a large group of upperclassmen messing around the Whomping Willow (the game Sirius had invented as a bet earlier in the year had turned into a full-blown school sport), but for once they didn't feel like joining in.  Sirius's gloomy mood was rubbing off on his friends no matter how hard they all tried to enjoy their last days of school.  Peter was whining that he'd failed his exams while James absently assured him otherwise. 

They'd only been walking around for about ten minutes when the results of their exams magically appeared posted on one of the great doors.  The Marauders drifted over and pushed their way to the front of the crowd of first years to see what they'd gotten.  They skimmed over their grades, but there were no real surprises.  Sirius had the top marks in the year in Transfiguration ("Bet McGonagall loved that.") with 115 points (McGonagall had given extra credit to students who were able to perform advanced Transfiguration spells), followed by James with a 113.  In Charms James had the highest score with a 109, Remus beat them all in Defense Against the Dark Arts with a 107, followed by Sirius with a 104 and…

"Snape? How'd that git get those kind of marks?  Isn't it supposed to be Defense _Against__ the Dark Arts?"_

James had the highest overall marks of all the first years; Sirius had refused to study which resulted in C's in both History of Magic and Herbology, and Remus's D in Potions had dropped his average considerably.

"A 79!  One more point and I would have got a friggin' B!  I hate Binns!" Sirius ranted.

James raised an eyebrow.  "Well maybe if you'd studied at all you would have gotten your B." 

"Or if you'd at least cracked a book all year." Remus added.

"For your information, Moony, I did "crack a book," I spent an entire hour drawing Quidditch figures in the History of Magic textbook."

They all laughed as they continued to skim the list of grades.  To James's fury, Snape had beaten him by four points in Potions.

"Oh come on, James, you knew Smeral would favor the Slytherins.  He always does." Peter piped up.

"But there was nothing wrong with my potion!  Nothing!  I double-checked every step!" he insisted, running a hand through his already messy hair.

"You have way too much time on your hands." Remus said, shaking his head.  Remus had never been any good at brewing potions and he wasn't all that interested in learning.

Sirius patted his best friend on the shoulder consolingly.  "Just look at Snape's Transfiguration grade.  That should make you feel better."

"At least you got a 96." Remus winced.  "That puts you 39 points up on me."

James grinned lopsidedly.  "No offense, Moony, but beating you in Potions isn't much of an accomplishment."

Remus punched him on the arm and Sirius broke in before it could turn into an all-out wrestling match right there on the steps of the castle with all the other first years crowded around trying to get a look at their own grades and watching the three most popular underclassmen at the school (everyone seemed to forget Peter's existence when talking about how hot the Marauders were).

"Why don't we go find Snivellus so James can have his revenge." Sirius suggested, grinning wickedly.

The devilish gleam that came to James's eyes at the prospect perfectly matched Sirius's evil grin.  

"I love the way you think, Sir."

"Only because I think exactly like you."

"Of course."

They found Snape sitting near the edge of the lake, reading again.

"This is too easy." James said in a bored voice as he leveled his wand at the greasy Slytherin.

Snape's body began to rise off the ground, but he was so absorbed in his book, and James performed the spell so well that the boy didn't notice until he was hovering three feet in the air and began to draw the attention of the students around him.  The laughter of a group of third year Hufflepuff girls caused Snape to look up from his book, and when he saw the ground was no longer beneath him, he tried to jump to his feet.  Since there was nothing supporting his other than James's spell, he merely succeeded in making himself look foolish.

They had now attracted the quite a crowd and James decided to make the spectacle more entertaining.  He was met with cheers of encouragement as he floated Snape out over the lake and repeatedly threatened to drop him into the water.  Peter was so excited that his voice was breathy as he murmured "Do it, do it."

"You sound like you're watchin' porn or sumthin, Pete." Sirius said disgustedly.

"Sirius!"

"Hey, I'm not the one goin' around sayin' 'do it, do it,' don't yell at me."

Remus was smirking slightly as James dropped Snape and caught him only inches from the surface of the lake, but it was Sirius who seemed to get the biggest kick out of making a fool of the boy who was always so cruel to Muggle-born children.  He bewitched Snape's body to act like a ballerina, much to the amusement of the audience and the furious embarrassment of Snape.

Snape was suspended in mid-air, rising and dropping, his body beyond his control and inverting itself into a difficult scorpion position that he wasn't nearly flexible enough to pull off.  Instead of looking graceful, he looked ridiculous and the fury on his face only made it worse.

"Fucking Mudblood lover!" he screeched at James.

Both James and Sirius looked like they would've liked to ring Snape's neck, but it was Remus who nudged James and motioned in the direction of the giant squid, basking in the shallows and stretching its tentacles lazily.  James grinned and made Snape dangle about five feet over the squid.  He was writhing crazily against the enchantment Sirius had put on him, making himself look more outlandish than ever and attracting the attention of the squid.

It reached out two enormous tentacles for him, but James started a game of cat and mouse, using Snape as the mouse.  Eventually he gave in to the cries of 'Drop him!' and allowed the squid to grab Snape.  The Slytherin screamed like a little girl as a wet, suction cup-covered tentacle wrapped around him and others started to prod him curiously as if trying to determine what he was.  

Soon the squid tired of its squealing prey and dropped him like a piece of garbage into the lake.  Snape was left to swim to shore (or dog paddle, more accurately) where he was met by the howling laughter of his classmates and James's condescending voice.

"See, Snape, wizards don't actually melt when they get wet.  You could actually take a shower and wash that filthy hair of yours."

Snape refused to answer as he stomped past them, dripping wet, and headed toward the castle.


	21. A Wonderful Ending to a Wonderful Year

On the last morning of his first year at Hogwarts, Sirius awoke at the crack of dawn and went about waking his three friends as usual.  First he pulled open the curtains of the bed next to his and looked down at James Potter's sleeping face with a wicked grin.  He pounced on the sleeping boy who came awake swinging his fists wildly, trying to land a solid punch even before he opened his eyes.  After ten months of rooming with Sirius he was used to this unconventional wake-up call.  

Sirius laughed as he rolled off of James, dodging his fists, and turned his attention to the bed on the other side of James's.  Peter's nasal snores could be heard all the way across the room as Sirius crept toward his unsuspecting victim.  He threw open the curtains around the smallest Marauder, but instead of jumping on Peter, he bent close to his ear and screamed at the top of his lungs.

Peter sat upright, screaming his lungs out, fear written on his face until he caught sight of Sirius's gloating grin.  "Get's ya every time, Pete." Sirius crowed.

He turned toward the last Marauder.  Moony…

"Hey James, wanna help me wake the wolf?"

"Sirius!"

"Aw don't worry, Fred here" he motioned toward the last occupied bed, "could sleep through the ceiling falling on his head."

James grinned.  "Guess you're right.  So, any ideas on how to wake Moony up without loosing any limbs?"

"Plenty, but they'd all leave us with a pretty pissed off werewolf on our hands once he actually got his lazy ass out of bed."

"Sirius, it's five thirty in the morning, anything you do to Remus is going to piss him off."

"Very true, mate."

"We could just leave him alone 'til he wakes up." Peter piped up nervously; there was nothing that frightened Peter more than his friends' tempers.

"Geese, Pettigrew, how boring can you be?" Sirius asked in annoyance.

"How bout dropping a bucket of water on him?" James suggested, ignoring Peter.

"Then we'd have a sopping wet, angry werewolf.  Sounds like a plan." Sirius grinned.

"You know Siri, I think you're suicidal." James stated.

"Nah, I just like to live life on the edge."

They sniggered uncontrollably as a bucket of ice water appeared over Remus's tawny head and dumped itself on the sleeping boy.  The pale boy sat up, spluttering in shock.

"What the fuck was that?!" he yelled.

Remus launched himself out of bed at the two black haired boys who were still laughing like maniacs.  They dodged him easily and he landed in a heap on Sirius's bed. 

"Goddamn pranksters!" he growled as they fell into the nearest empty beds, howling in amusement.

"Talk about the pot calling the kettle black!" James snorted when he had gotten a hold of himself.

Remus just growled something deep in his throat, waved a hand to dry himself and stomped off into the shower, to the endless amusement of his friends.

"Only Moony would rant and rave about getting wet and then go take a shower." Sirius chuckled affectionately.

By the time he emerged the shower wrapped in a towel, Remus was in a much better mood.

"So why in Merlin's name did you two wake me up in the middle of the night?" he asked with only the slightest trace of annoyance.

"Moony, it's 5:45; that is _not _the middle of the night." Sirius chuckled.

"Says the kid who spends most nights wandering the castle looking for secret passages." Remus retorted.

"Yeah, well I've prolly found most of the secret passages _in _the castle and the map's almost finished."  Sirius rejoined.

"And thank Merlin, you let me sleep through most of it, but what's the plan this time?"

"We're going to give Filch a nice wake up call." James said, an evil grin spreading across his face.

"I think about forty of Filibuster's Long-Lasting Fireworks, a handful of Dungbombs and a few overflowing toilets should be nice enough." Sirius added innocently.

Remus grinned.  "We're gonna be so dead.  Count me in."

*          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *          *

            The Marauders were met with applause from their fellow students when they entered the Great Hall; everyone had seen the effects of the prank and knew exactly who was responsible.  Much to Remus's amazement, they had managed to set off all their remaining Dungbombs and fireworks in different passages throughout the school and cause all of the toilets in the castle (even the staff restroom on the fifth floor) to overflow, which was made worse by the frog spawn they had put in them first, and all without getting caught.

They'd past Filch, who was busy mopping up water, on their way to the feast and the look on his face told them that he knew just as well as the students who had caused all the mischief, but he had no proof and the Marauders were going to get away Scott-free.

The feast was wonderful; there were mounds of delicious foods and everyone seemed to get their favorite dish.  Remus was stuffing himself as though he thought he'd never eat again, Sirius was alternately snogging with his girlfriend Krissy and bragging with James about how brilliant and untouchable they were to have gotten away with their prank.  Peter would occasionally throw something into the conversation, but the two best friends would just nod absently and go back to whatever they'd been talking about.

When the feast finally drew to a close Dumbledore stood up to make his end of the year speech.

"Another year has come and gone and I am not getting any younger.  I must say that this has been a very entertaining year." he glanced over at the Marauders before continuing. "I hope your minds are somewhat fuller than they were when you arrived here, and I am quite sure that what your teachers spent ten months cramming into your little minds will have fallen out by the start of the next term.  I hope you all have wonderful summers.  To our departing seventh years; I have enjoyed watching you grow and I will enjoy even more seeing the world strip from you your convictions that you know everything there is to know." his blue eyes were twinkling merrily. "I look forward to seeing life confuse and befuddle until you are quite certain that you know nothing other than that we all walk upside down on our heads and Brussels sprouts are every bit as tasty as treacle tarts, and then you will achieve true wisdom."  The seventh years laughed uproariously.  "And to our younger students; I look forward to more years of filling your heads with as many things, useful or useless, as possible so that one day you may leave here as clueless as your elders."

There was tumultuous applause and much laughter and pounding on the tables.  Everyone said fondly that Dumbledore was completely off his rocker and that he was the greatest wizard who'd ever lived.  As soon as the raucous died down, Dumbledore continued his speech.

"Now it is time to award the House Cup.  Fourth place goes to Slytherin with 325 points.  Third goes to Hufflepuff with 372 points.  Second to Ravenclaw with 391 points.  And the House Cup goes to Gryffindor with 423 points.  Congratulations Gryffindor!"

The cheering from the Gryffindor table was so loud it seemed to shake the enchanted roof, which at the moment was showing the most gorgeous sunny day anyone could wish for.  The Marauders were shocked; they'd stopped worrying about House standings ages ago, thinking that there was no chance of Gryffindor winning with all the points they'd lost.  They'd been so focused on enjoying their last hours at school that they hadn't even noticed that the Great Hall was decorated in Gryffindor colors with a great golden lion behind the High table.

Krissy noticed their confusion and laughed.

"Didn't you hear?  McGonagall, Flitwick and a bunch of other teachers gave points for everyone to get over 100 on their exams.  I think they did it just because none of them wanted to see Slytherin win again, but whatever the reason was it got us almost a hundred points."  Her eyes glittered at the Marauders.  Obviously she knew just _who_ had gotten them those extra points.  "And Malfloy lost Slytherin 150 when him, Crabbe, and Goyle got caught picking on a little Ravenclaw first year and calling her a Mudblood." she added.

Sirius looked happier than he had in days.  "So you're saying Malfloy won the Cup for us?  I'll have to remember to thank him."

The Marauders grinned at each other.  It was a perfect end to a wonderful year; they'd won back a few of the points they'd lost with their mischief-making, Malfloy had lost the Cup for Slytherin, and next year Gryffindor would have a chance for the Quidditch Cup, too.  It didn't get much better than that.

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A/N:  Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers!  I love u guys.  I uploaded the rest of this story cuz I'm going on vacation until school starts so I might not have time later.  Hope you like.


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